Marvel, Please Invent This…

Marvel Comics (and DC as well) come up with all sorts of crazy things all the time. Webshooters, batarangs, antimatter equations, costumes made of unstable molecules… but what I really want is a Doombot.

200px-Doctor_Doom_001Doombots often time actually believe they are Doom. They curse “Richhhhhhhhhhhards!” and demand that others “kneel before them”. They try and kill the Fantastic Four and run Latveria with an iron fist–sometimes literally.

Other Doombots do more mundane stuff… guarding Doom’s castle from that accursed Richards and others including the Avengers and occasionally the X-Men. Ask Storm sometime about the time Dr. Doom trapped her in a statue. She was really excited and almost killed everyone.

So I gotta believe that there are Doombots that are even more useful around the house. Sure, you need the Doombots to try and kill the Fantastic Four. That’s a given. But are there Doombots that do dishes? Clean out the litter box? Dust? Think about it,  you are at a party. You want to drink but you can’t,  you brought your car. Ah-ha, the Doombot will take you home, even after you have the third Smirnoff that, frankly, turns you into kind of a bitch.

You set up Rock Band and your friends bail? “Very well. Doom shall take the drum kit. But Doom demands we stop doing ‘Jeremy’ over and over again!”  If you go away for a long weekend, Doom may pout about being left home but he will feed the cat and do the laundry while you are gone.

Tasks I do not suggest giving Doom: going to pick up your friend whose last name happens to be Richards, anything to do with time travel, brokering peace in the Middle East, and ironing. Everyone knows that Doom takes stuff out of the dryer and hangs it up right away.

I’m just spitballing ideas here. And now I have the idea in my head of a Kirby style Doombot wearing a “Kiss The Cook” apron as he prepares me dinner. I don’t know how the real Dr. Doom would react to my idea, but I bet he would speak in the third person and blame RICHARDS for it.

Category: Comics