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Urban Bone Machete, Mark III

“Is Wayne Brady gonna have to choka bitch?” That is what he would say if he didn’t have this Zombie Slaying Masterpiece! Available at ZombieTools.net, you can order a vast array of post apocolyptic Bitch Hackers!

The journey to perfection for the Urban Bone Machete is one huge step closer with the addition of the Mark III. Just hold this girl and you can hear her whisper a bloody longing for carnage. The new handle design, also seen in the Zack Ax, will protect your digits if you feel the need to brutally punch a bitch’s* skull to a slimy pulp. A slightly longer blade combined with a curved tip make for an unprecedented level of cutting power.

The Urban Bone Machete Mark III is a full-tang blade of 5160 spring steel with a hand-sculpted T6 aluminum handle. Comes with black Kydex sheath.

(* and by ‘bitch’, we mean ‘zombie’.)

Put your name on standby, you don’t want to be the only one with your brains about to be eaten, and NO machete to decapitate your foe!!

Category: Nerd Culture

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