Top Ten Nerd Types & Their Toys

01-16-10 • Comics, Cool Stuff, Featured, Videogames Posted by Luke Gallagher

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(Post by nerdbastards contributor Melissa Fouch Machowski)

So…which type of nerd are you? Find your Nerd Type and check out some fun facts about your future!

1. Collector Nerd: Pogs, Trader Cards, Action Figures, Comic Books, Stamps, Happy Meal toys — This type of nerd will likely become a serial killer.

2. Enginerd: Hamm Radio, Erector Set, Lincoln Logs, Legos, model kits — Please do not leave an enginerd in the sun for too long, as they have very little tolerance for natural light. Likeliest of all nerds to start a company in a garage and wind up rich.

3. Fantasy Nerd: Crossbows & Catapults, D&D, WoW (and all other fantasy video games), costumes, figurines, cloaks, crystal balls — Its a good bet that this type of nerd will move to NYC and work in the fetish industry or whittle away the Summers working at a Ren Faire.

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4. Nerds Who Like To Push Buttons: Mr. Professor, Simon, Speak n Spell — Also known as The Arcade Nerd, this kind of nerd may actually have a chance at a normal social life as these toys teach communication skills and drive these individuals out into Arcades where they may interface with others.

spirograph[1] 5. Art Nerd — Spirograph, Origami, Rock Tumbler, Woodburning Kit — For these nerds the future could include becoming a Christmas Sweater-wearing, glue-huffing packrat or a successful artist.

6. Science Nerd: Chemistry set, ant farm, invisible man/woman, microscope, binoculars, magnifying glass — Infamous science nerds are too many to list, but the ones who do not go on to a life of acedemic success may end up on Jeopardy.

star_wars_crew_2 7. Sci-Fi Nerd: Sci-fi action figures, anything Star Wars, Star Trek or Tolkien-related, weaponry, homemade tricorders & other duplicated gadgets — Many of these nerds will marry Fantasy Nerds and live dorkily ever after.

rocketnerd 8. Outdoor Nerd: model rockets, all flying things… boomerangs, remote control airplanes & helicopters, paratrooper action figures — As adults, it is almost impossible to recognize this kind of nerd due to their athletic physique and ability to interface with the world as pilots or perhaps architects.

9. Puzzle Nerd: Rubik’s Cube, Crosswords, Sudoku, Jigsaws, Riddles — Very likely to run with the Arcade Nerd crowd and cross over into a second Nerd Type.

10. Performance Nerd: Magic Tricks, Puppets, Trombone, Marrionettes — Beware the performance nerd, for they will easily end up with all of your money. Con-artists, creeps and subway mashers.

Any Nerd Type resemblance to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental, besides the puppets part, which is based on Kevin Lehman and a lot of the other stuff which is based on my husband Mike, my brother Tim and his dungeonerd friends. But other than than, its just a coincidence. Yep.