There’s a long list of things that I couldn’t care less about (nope, not even if you strapped a gold plated Darth Vader and a flaming fetus *ha!* to them). One of them is this horrible idea of making the game Roller Coaster Tycoon into a movie. A Couple of weeks ago the internet world caught wind of the fact that Sony has purchased the rights to turn this multi-billion (not a typo) dollar franchise into a movie. Sony, take a moment to realize you have reached the point where you have far too much money and free time, you’re 6 months away from pulling a Goldmember and shmelting your shlong in 24kt gold. Well after NerdBastards reported on this news they main question (after “Why?”) was “What the hell is this going to be about?” Now we know! For all 3 of you interested here’s what Sony has to say…
Well we had a pitch, a story — it’s basically a theme park comes to life. We had a story woven into the theme park of the Rollercoaster Tycoon, and that’s what we sold to Sony, and that’s what we’re hoping to make into a movie.” Zwart said the pitch is inspired by the fantasy everyone has as a kid, to be left alone in the theme park to roam freely. “Just the idea of taking a ride like in Disneyland and the rides suddenly come to life, [or] you’re able to step off and stay behind when everybody else had gone.
Thanks Sony, but no thanks. I have more important things to spend my money on i.e.illegal substances, movies about people being sewn ass to mouth and condoms. Maybe next time.