Beast Man- Skeletor’s lackey or should I say bitch? Why else would Beast Man stick around and take verbal and physical abuse unless he was getting a good d*cking? I also believe that ole fur face here would be referred in the gay community as a “bear”. According to Wikipedia (and not from any personal experience), Bears have hairy bodies and facial hair and tend to be heavy set. Well, I wonder who that describes? It also doesn’t help that Beastie is sporting some serious bondage gear. Chest harness and a whip for those not paying attention.
Man-At-Arms- Christ, if his name doesn’t incite endless organge armored man hugging then how about that stache? Flavor savor?, I think so.
Being the mentor to Prince Adam you know he taught him how to hold a loft his magic sword (hehe).
Leech- “Evil Master of Power Suction” Yep, that’s what the tagline on the toys packaging says. Technically he is what his name implies, a leech but one may wonder in a sea of other questionably gay characters what specifically he was sucking. I’d also like to bring awareness to the fact that the Leech action figure can be used as a nipple torture device (Again, not speaking from personal experience).
Extendar- “Heroic Master of Extension”. Another suggestive packaging tagline. I guess “heroic master of being the envy of every other fur short short wearing warrior” was too long. (hehe see what I did there). This character was hardly ever scene in the cartoon because he was usually off screen using his (ahem) extensions in a manner that was not meant for the eyes of children. Giant metal dong people, giant metal dong.
Ram Man- The human phallus who’s only job was to Ram things. Sure, he could be ramming the ladies but what ladies man wears a skirt? Seriously, how often do you suppose he gets mud on his helmet?
Fisto- Not only does this guy look like he should be the poster child for gay San Francisco circa 1969 but if his freaking jumbo sized fist doesn’t imply this guys magnitude for asshole spelunking need I remind you of his name?