He-Man says “Hey”.
Yep, talk of a He-Man movie has reared it’s ugly head again. Mind you, I am a huge Masters of the Universe fan. It’s like my go-to cartoon. In fact, the only stuff I purposely go out and buy (if you consider Ebay as going out) anymore is He-Man related merch. So, being that I am a die-hard fan, I won’t a accept a movie that’s anything less than an EPIC, high-budgeted, stylistic, Sci-Fi, fantasy, action flick that’s dark and bleak with a modicum of humor (for the kiddies). 300 meets Lord of The Rings. Since He-man is just too weird and perhaps too gay (quite a few homo erotic undertones), anyone besides Peter Jackson or Guillermo Del Toro will royally fuck it up. But I digress.
The last word we heard on the project was over a year ago when two new writers were hired to re-write a script by Justin Marks (who apparently wrote Heman as a warrior astronaut and had Skeletor wearing a metal mask ala Doctor Doom). Predators screenwriters Mike Finch and Alex Litvak, are the ones working on the most recent draft.
Now, according According Sony Vice President DeVon Franklin the He-Man film adaptation Masters of the Universe is not only still on, but the script should be turned in very soon. He expressed his excitement for the film saying,
One of other things I’m really excited about is we’re doing a reboot of the 1980s franchise Masters of the Universe. The He-Man franchise. Very excited about that. Should have that script very soon. I’m praying that we can start figuring out how we’re going to make it.
“start figuring out how we’re going to make it”? Oi, fuck me with a black dildo why don’t you (please don’t). That’s not a show of confidence. Not at all. It’s almost like he’s admitting “yea were gonna have zero budget and we’re gonna make it as kid friendly as possible”. I’m of course putting words in his mouth. I have no idea what he thinks or what his intentions are, but knowing Hollywoods aptitude for adapting and ruining 80’s cartoon franchises, I’m sure my assessment is not far off.
I can only hope the writing team and creatives behind this wish to preserves the heart of the source material, take it in a new direction, and add a bit of mythos and depth. Perhaps something representational to the nerd fan art above. That would be nice.
He-Man and the Masters of the Universe started out as a toy line that spawned a popular animated series that ran from 1983 to 1985. They later created a couple animated TV remakes, and a memorable live-action film in 1987, which stared Dolph Lundgren. Frank Langella was the shit as Skeletor!