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So here I am, Mrs. NerdBastards that is, attending my very first Comic-Con. Let’s just say the anticipation has been getting to me and now that I am actually here, I’m somewhat at a loss for words. Let’s start my adventure at the very beginning and give all you Never-been-to-the-Con Bastards out there a play-by-play walk though of how it is out here.

First off, the flight from Boston to San Diego sucks, especially because I was wedged in-between Luke (Mr. Too-many-cupcakes) and some older dude that had really hairy legs on our second flight from Dallas. Going to Dallas wasn’t as bad since it was not a full flight. But anyways, the second flight sucked. So we land in San Diego and walk around aimlessly looking for the 992 Metro Bus. We find the damn stop and wait 10 minutes next to some kid who couldn’t help but point out every car, and every taxi, and every bus that drove by…I hate little bastard children. So we get on the bus and I ask Luke to ask the bus driver which stop is Broadway and Columbia. Luke waddles his way up to the front and totally forgets what he is supposed be asking the bus driver…Bastard. The bus pulls up to a stop and I casually point out our hotel is across the street. Luke says, “Oh, should we get off now.” Well, ummm…..yeah!

So into our hotel we go. And did I mention it’s actually a HOSTEL, not a HOTEL. What the hell was I thinking? An old YMCA turned hostel. Getto…Luckily for us we ended up getting a room with 2 twin beds as opposed to the 1 twin bed we were supposed to have. That’s the ONLY plus side to this situation so far. So we go up to our room and walk in, Eaww….Let’s just say if I had a blacklight only god knows what would show up. And even Luke pointed out when I pulled the sheets back, “Watch out, you might just find a used condom under there.” Thanks for the tip.

So now that we are settled, time to head of to the convention center. The press registration line was nothing at all what we were expecting. We were in and out in under 5 minutes. Easy enough. Now what? It’s 3pm and the exhibit hall doesn’t open until 6pm. Ok, let’s grad something to eat. And what does any normal Bastard do? Find a cheap sub-shop, in our case, Subway…Eat Fresh.

And back to the convention center were we tirelessly wait in the upper levels since sitting along the walls on the main floor is not allowed. Me on my computer documenting our expreience and Luke on his IPhone with his stinky feet. And after an hour of angonizing stench, Luke finds out we should have been in line to enter the exhibit hall. Damn first timers….but then again it doesn’t help there are no signs to direct you where to go. So, I can’t blame him 100% for not knowing where we should have been.

A side note, if I may: why is it that when a large herd of geeks/nerds/whatevers come together in one area, all that lingers in the air is really bad BO and swamp ass?

The doors open and the people go rushing into the Con floor. First impression: definitely thought it was going to be bigger. I’m not going to lie, from what I have heard I thought the expo floor was going to be GINORMOUS; it was only, in my eyes, pretty big. Free shit was being handed out everywhere but I could only take so many free plastic bags and free coupons for shit I would never buy. I did however stand in line for Luke and purchased a Mumm-ra Staction Figure from Action Figure Express. And it came with a little Mumm-mutt which was pretty cute. The Hasbro line, forget it. Keep checking back every 70 minutes…ridiculous. Just form a big ass line and everyone would have been happy. Instead stinky people being pissed off and security-wannabees was a regular sight and the “End of Line.” However, Luke did score the big-mother-fuckin’ Stay Puft Marshmallow Man…that things is freakin’ awesome!

Oh, and did I mention I saw Stan Lee…best part of the day, hell, best part of the trip. I love that man.

So, as the day came to an end Luke and I returned to our skeevy hostel. We pulled out the toys he bought and thought, how the hell are we going to get this stuff home? And now I’m trying to figure out how I am going to be able to handle tomorrow. Sure, today was easy, walk to floor and check shit out. Tomorrow is a whole other story. Panels and Q&A…all the good stuff is going to start. So, until tomorrow my Bastard friends…check out some cool pics from today and stay tuned for tomorrows shenanigans.

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