I try to not indulge in Amazing Spider-Man news. I hated Marc Webb‘s reboot.  It was the worst iteration of Spider-Man ever.

EDITORS NOTE: There’s an news article in here somewhere, I just felt the need to get a little ranty. Join the conversation, or skip my diatribe and jump straight to the news.

The plot was a mess and did not work. Need I mention the dropped sub plot regarding Parker’s dead parents?

Spidey’s motocross inspired costume was fugly as fuck – and why did he take his mask off every 5 minutes revealing his identity to everybody? (Couldn’t he breathe in that thing?)

The lizard looked like a Goomba from Mario Bros, but hey, at least the Goomba had more convincing motivations. Lizard/Connors was such a cookie cutter villain, it wasn’t even funny. Denis Leary made a better villain as Gwen Stacy’s hard-ass daddy.

How about the sloppy writing? Like, for example, that scene where Parker catches a football and chucks it at a goal post 100 yards away, bends it in half, and the entire football team ignores the super human feat? Oh, never mind. I forgot, he took his mask off 50 times by this point. Entire population of NY knows he’s Spider-Man, and they are cool with it. Let’s not forget about Gwen. Blondy is in high-school for Christ sake and she is lead intern to the worlds foremost genetics lab? Alright, I’ll let that one pass. But, explain to me how Dr. Connors spent a lifetime creating his tissue regrowth formula, but Gwen is able to decode and make anti lizard spores in 5 minutes, on top of a sky scraper? Is Gwen super smart, or was Connors just an overly funded half-whit?

Let’s talk about the complete and utter disregard to Spider-Man as a comic book character, shall we? SM/Parker is meant to be a social outcast, loser, who seeks love and belonging and eventually becomes a hero. NOT some hipster heart-throb who skates around the neighborhood questioning his identity. Speaking of which, you have the ability to climb walls, and made web shooters to swing from… why the fuck are you skating!?

The movie had issues. Too many for me to cope with. I’m appalled at the thought of a sequel. But, a sequel they will make.

The Amazing Spider-Man 2 (or whatever they’re going to call it) is gearing up in fact. The plot has been teased, villains speculated about, and costume changes have been addressed.

Adding to the discussion is Stan Lee (the all father of comics) and director Marc Webb. They talk about exploring more of Peter Parker’s universe, as well as the promise of answered question about his parents. Watch the video below.

In other SM2 news, a bearded Andrew Garfield was on the Ellen DeGeneres show recently and revealed the sequel will begin shooting next February. This puts the film on track for it’s May 2nd, 2014 release date. [ComicBookMovie]

Meanwhile, I’m looking for a fuck to give.

Category: Comics, Film

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