Nerd Bastards 12 Days of Christmahanakwanzika – Day 11

- 12-11-12Featured Posted by Jeremy R! Hudson

While the flux-capacitor hasn’t been perfected, and we can’t help you fix any past holiday humbuggery, maybe we can help you get this holiday season off to a good start.

For the next 12 days (Dec 1st-12th), the staff of Nerd Bastards will be listing a few of their favorite nerdy things. Gadgets, doohickeys, thingamabobs and more – all sorts of  items that have been Nerd tested and Bastard approved. Basically, stuff you want, things you need, and everything you can’t have.

We hope you’ll  find some unique and nerdtastic gifts among our selections, and that they make their way under your tree, Menorah or Kwanzaa bush.

Hit the jump for jeremy r! hudson’s list of Nerdful things. Check back tomorrow for Sam‘s list. To see archive of this feature, click HERE.

Now for my Nerdmas wish list/Geek holiday gift guide I decided (for no real determinable reason) to stick to the confines of the Internets biggest swap meet. Yes what follows is a list of the finest gift ideas eBay has to suit the needs of the nerdy. I will warn you it can be a bit pricey in places, but I figure out of the the thousands of you out there, a couple of you have to be dot-com millionaires or billionaire orphans with piles of f-you money. I would also like to remind the extremely wealthy out there that giving is the true meaning of the season and you are more than welcome to give any (or all) of these to me.

Thank you and lets begin.

The elusive and hard to find Murray Christmas T-Shirt, the perfect holiday piece of clothing. The Chive had these available for about 28 minutes before all but the size smalls sold out. For us non-hobbits it looks like there are a few up on eBay for around $50 bucks.

No matter how old you are, Star Wars toys always make great gifts. Can’t decide which one to get? How about ALL OF THEM! Ok, while not a complete set of every Star Wars figure ever made this massive collection containing over 2600 figures and playsets from the Kenner years to the Hasbro toys of today makes a good start. Not only is the seller offering rare and hard to find figures (like every Twi’lek ever!) but the auction also contains armies. Yes, armies. What’s better than one Stormtrooper? How about one hundred Stormtroopers! A steal at only $26000 bucks. One downside however,it appear that many of them are still in their packages so after you win this you might want to get a few friends to come help you open them all up.

 

If you grew up in the 80s you grew with the promise of a future where we would all have robots for best friends. Other than the mutual respect I share with my Roomba, the closest I ever came to that promise was owning one of the fine programmable toy robots made by Tomy. While the one I had as a kid now rests immobile in my office, right now on eBay is a near mint Omnibot 2000. This was the top of the line model only owned by fantastically rich and spoiled. I can’t remember how much they retailed for back then, but I do know they were insanely (by my child minds standards) expensive. At the moment, this one is running about $2500 on eBay, plus shipping. From Europe. A small price to pay for a new best friend, right? Keen eyes might also recognize this little fellow from his recent big screen appearance as ’80s Robot’ in the recent movie The Muppets.

 

Who wouldn’t want an Adam West autographed Batarang inscribed with ‘wham’ (zop, biff, bam, zap and other onomatopoeias also available.) The campy pop-culture win of owning the Dark Knights signature weapon of choice personally signed  by arguably the most charming of the Batmen is undeniable. Comes with a $299.99 price tag which is well worth it, old chum.

 

You can never go wrong with a good sized pile of comic books and eBay is filled with auctions that are just that. Whether you are looking for certain key issues or just want grab a few long boxes filled with 4 colour goodness, there are thousands of options out there. Sure, to the uninitiated a box filled with old comics might seem like a lame gift, but to a true comic fan the sheer joy of flipping through a few hundred books just so see whats in the box is a gift all unto itself.

 

Now we are talking.$120,000.00 dollars for this Replica V8-Interceptor. A 1973 XB Ford Falcon Coupe complete with the Mad Max custom body kit, wheels, blower and idlers, roof radio, sirrens, steering wheel, zoomies, blower gear switch and blue police dash light. Now, if you’re more in the market for for a screen accurate Road Warrior version, just let my wife drive it around for a week or two. She’ll have it looking like its been to the wasteland and back in no time.

 

Your first reaction might be ‘Jeremy, why do you think I’d want zombie killing armor?‘ Well my response to you is that I don’t think you want it, I am saying you might need it. When the hordes of cannibalistic corpses show up at your doorstep and all you are wearing is your Star Trek themed Snuggie™ don’t say I didn’t warn you. Being sold for $699.99, it comes unpainted. Yeah, unpainted in the blood of the living dead.

 

We’ll wrap up with 50 lbs of dehydrated sausage at the asking price of $1,556.00 (plus shipping.) This is #1 FDA approved for human consumption Pork Sausage. No bones, hide, skin, hair or other undesirable pig parts. Advertised to last 12 to 15 years if stored properly. When re-hydrated it magically transforms into a whopping 200 lbs of tasty tasty sausage  that should go along way when you need it most. Combine it will all items listed above and when the Chrismapocalypse begins on the 21st of December not only will you be well set as a warrior in this new twisted living hell that life will become in the end times (complete with robot sidekick,) but you should also have enough toys and comic books to last you for a few months after the end of the world.

You’re welcome.

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