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With the pending home video release of Gareth Edwards‘ 2014 reboot of Godzilla coming to a retailer near you in another week, we pause to do some navel gazing at all the things that he did wrong in the film. YEAH! Take that Edwards. You may be still growing as a filmmaker, and Godzilla was only your second movie, but since you didn’t make the Godzilla movie we all had playing in our heads we’re going to tear you a new one! Ahem. Now that I’ve got that out of my system, let’s introduce a couple of new videos to hit the interwebs today. On the one hand we have a judicious You Tuber who edited together all the Godzilla and MOTU bits in two vids that show how little screen time they all got, and secondly, Honest Trailers has put together a – well – honest trailer for Godzilla.

First up, the screen time videos, which do not come without controversy. YouTube user John Nemesis (via /Film) edited them together, and while the Godzilla video clocks out at just under eight minutes, the MOTU one runs just over 12. Some believe that the Godzilla video comes out short, and that there’s at least three more minutes of Godzilla screen time to be mined, but stacking up this footage back-to-back and its hard not to feel anything but short changed. Check ’em out:

While I have no doubt that Mr. Nemesis is pretty close to the mark, I would point out that if one were to add up all of Ricardo Montalban‘s screen time in Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan, it probably wouldn’t break 20 minutes, and that film was named after its main antagonist too. Sadly, it looks like no one on You Tube’s done that research, but as Montalban himself pointed out in an interview, an actor should never count pages, and even though Khan isn’t on screen that much, the other characters are always talking about him. I think the same argument can be made about Godzilla. Perhaps if Aaron Taylor-Johnson‘s army man, or his movie father played by Bryan Cranston had been stronger it wouldn’t have mattered as much.

Anyway, human performance were on top of mind for the gang at Screen Junkies when they put together this Honest Trailer for Godzilla. Let’s roll it.

Some of that was funny, but I don’t think it was especially fair. First of all, I don’t think anyone set up this movie as a “face-off between Walter White and Godzilla,” and if anyone thought that then they were reading way too much into the movie. Secondly, calling Taylor-Johnson’s character an “a-hole” for being a soldier and doing is duty a little harsh, even though the thing about him being a bomb disposal expert that never disposes any bombs is spot on. Seriously, how many different jobs are there in the army? He couldn’t be a search and rescue guy? That would have made some more sense in the context of the screenplay. But say what you want about Discount Channing Tatum, just don’t diss Ken Wantanabe! I think along with “Bryan Crynstan” he’s the only one that knows what movie he’s and and delivers the requisite mix of camp and drama.

Now I know that Edwards take on the King of the Monsters wasn’t to everyone’s taste, and while I concede that some of the criticisms of it are legitimate, I’ve got to wonder something. Screen Junkies must have had to review the entirety of Roland Emmerich‘s Godzilla to find just the right clip to encapsulate its terribleness, right? So how can they gloss over the Godzilla babies, the stupid name game with Matthew Broderick‘s character, the stereotype French guys from French central casting, the actress who played the love interest and was never heard from again, Mayor Ebert, whatever accent that Hank Azaria was doing, and all the assorted stupidity that went into making that movie, which is even more expensive when adjusted for inflation, and still say tongue-in-cheek that the 2014 Godzilla was the best “American” Godzilla movie?

Food for thought. Now give us yours. Sound off on all things Godzilla below.

The movie itself will be on DVD and Blu-ray shelves next Tuesday.

Category: Film

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