Do you wonder how a staff meeting would go on all the worlds of all the bosses you have to take on in so many video games? Neither did I…Don’t miss this, its College Humor’s new installment in their bountiful world of beautifully rendered 16 bit to 8 bit hilarity .” How come one man, ONE MAN!! an get through literally thousands of you trained killers??!!”  They demand!! ” Just stop them from moving to the right!!!!!!”

It’s funny because it’s so true…

(This article contains nudity and is NSFW)

From the beginning of time there has been one thing that has baffled and fascinated men. Fascinated them to the brink of madness, to full scale war and sometimes even horrific crimes. These things are not uncommon, and are not too often overlooked. In fact they are constantly ogled, studied and discussed. What could these possibly be? Boobs. Not just normal boobs though, celebtitties. In many years of being a film buff I have compiled a list of favorites from full on exposure to a snippet of a first time starlett that wasn’t yet famous. The best are the celebs who made their nude debut after years of coy shyness, just to have a ,no pun intended, unveiling. If you have your favorite breasts to discuss, comment away. All these females are amazing specimans to say the least in the male objectification of women…  (more…)

Former child actor Corey Haim reportedly died Wednesday morning of an apparent overdose, several media outlets have confirmed. The 38-year-old who was a teen heartthrob during the late 80’s and early 90’s and known as Half of the Two Coreys. His good looks and patented laugh rose with his star when the 2 met on the set of one of the greatest Vamp movies ever “The Lost Boys” (more…)

Asked on the Red Carpet about when Bill and Ted were going to have another triumphant adventure through time, Keanu Reeves, who I believe had an awesome attitude  about this whole thing, was fantastic. The question he has to be asked at least once daily for the past 20 years, he was shockingly cavalier about! When asked if he was kidding he said “I’m not! I’m not!”

Problem is, try to get a read on him. I can’t tell if he’s being sarcastic! Because at the end of the interview he sounds dead serious. At the beginning however he sounds like he’s kidding.

I would like to say, that as a child, I LOVED Bogus Journey. However now now?? B&T’s Bogus Journey is SO terrible that it hurts. It was just dumb. 90’s dumb. I still love it, though but can you imagine part 3? The thing is, they are all in their early 40’s (I believe) or even late late 30’s. What can they do about a script? Wyld Stallions aligned the planets and brought peace and harmony to the world and universe. Opening communications to alien life on other planets to small domestic household pets…So what could they do? Throw some plot ideas out my way, I’d be interested to hear what you guys think.

And PLEASE… NO REBOOT

Zach Galifianakis, the woolly weirdo beirdo comedian hosted Saturday Night Live this weekend. Needless to say, his style of humor was an odd match,but the actor, hot off his “Hangover” Success made what could’ve been a catastrophe, a symphony of comedy.

All of his sketches were great, including his, again, very unorthodox monologue, which you can watch at NBC.com

This was a Digital Short/Video which was a very rare sequence. It was Zach stopping by nearly EVERY NBC show and standing in the background… It was a laugh out loud funny and totally random.

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So, while the Uber succefful Wolverine X-Men Origins made huge bank, it garnerd mediocre reviews by critics and fans alike. Well it now has a sequel that has just been penned by C Mac:

Christopher McQuarrie, of “X-Men” and “Valkyrie” fame, has finished the script that THR reported he was starting last August.

No director has been signed. And the script is a little different than originally thought

See my problem with the original was that I believed it should’ve been rated R in true Wolverine berszerker, hack nd slash action. Yes, they gave him his funny quirks, And Liev Schrieber was a superb Sabretooth, but the movie was too fluff  for audiences who anted Wolverine going mental, which he is absoluteky known for. The New story set in Japan is absolutely a 180 from the lst film and I have high hopes for it, . There are also plenty of X-Men movies on the boards. The next one will bring back director Bryan Singer, who made the first two films. When Singer was sidelined with “Superman Returns. The first 2 X-Men being the superiour, with X-men 3 sucking it big time and being directed by Brett Ratner. hopefully with Singer back at the helm, the new X-men will FSU for us once more.

As for Wolveine 2? I was one of the only people who REALLY enjoyed Wolverine 2…Let’s hope they tag it with an R and let Wolverine loose on the theater. How do you catch a beast? Release a Beast to go after the first one.

People get very innovative around their wedding time. Instance 1: My buddy Chris dresssed as Han Solo marying Princess Leia on their wedding even though the priest was Vader..He must have survived the dark side and came back as a Jedi for for the ceremony. Instance 2: Before that Wedding, I walked down the isle before my wife to the ceremonial march a the end of Episode 4 A New Hope… I had the whole resort watching and was told by many a drunken male later that night, that they always wanted for their wedding but the WIFE wouldn’t allow it. Lucky me and my bud, have cool wives..More afer the jump (more…)

Swordplay is a major part of a lot of movies. Anti climactic, final fights or downright dirty army vs. army brawls. But these men are usually lead or inspired by ONE amazing warrior. Or the ONE  amazing warrior has a reason to keep on fighting..This is a list of the most amazing wielders of the blade in movies.

I can’t put these in Order from 1 to 10. So what I’m gonna have to do is keep it has the The Top 10 BEST. Such as ALL of them are the best. But that won’t satisfy you all, I am required to make an actual countdown. So my hand has been moved not by me but of my pain. My pain that I can’t leave well enough alone. and even though some are better or to correct myself…Some may be better to you… I want feedback. Please send me your ideas? Anybody I’m leaving out? And please Highlander nerds, PLEASE don’t tell me Kurgan or McLeod were left out! I implore you! All they did was grunt and bang swords together…Come up with some GOOD ones.

So here are the Top 10 Best Swordsmen! These are the elite, cinematically, proficiently and charismatically.

(more…)

IMDB had the dirt:

As I predicted, the Academy of Motion Picture Arts & Sciences is penalizing The Hurt Locker producer Nicolas Chartier for violating Academy campaign standards by sending an email to his friends that promoted The Hurt Locker and dissed Avatar. Later at the Academy’s behest Chartier sent an apologetic letter. Should the movie win best picture, states AMPAS, Chartier will not be one of the producers ascending the platform to accept his award, because he will not be admitted to the Oscar ceremony. His ticket has been revoked. Three producers, Kathryn Bigelow, Mark Boal and Gregory Shapiro, would accept their gold statues. Chartier would still be able to pick up his award at a later date. The executive committee of the Academy’s producer’s branch voted on

What does it matter if Nick Chartier “Dissed” Avatar? He is up and running against a Goliath that even a sling and stone won’t fell. When football teams are in the  in the playoffs or the Superbowl, talking trash is a given. “Violating Academy campaign standards by sending an email to his friends”…..I am on team Nicolas, did you see the word the press used? “FRIENDS”??!!It’s not like he sent in a slanderous, propaganda filled promotion that was sent to every member of the academy to sway their opinions. Now his tickets are revoked??

The LA times:

The decision comes on the heels of Chartier sending an e-mail message to a group of colleagues that included academy members asking them to choose the Summit Entertainment-distributed “The Hurt Locker” for best picture and “not the $500-million film” — a clear reference to “Avatar.”

Even if he did, its his rival? Why does it matter? People take bets constantly on who will win and lose, obviously the guys who worked on the Hurt locker weren’t expecting to get nominations, and the fact of the matter is, Avatar was FANTASTIC…But if it was in 2D and not visually innovative and stunning, the question here is…”Would Avatar even have been noticed by the Academy??”

The message was deemed in violation of the academy’s ban against creating a negative impression of a rival nominee.
Chartier subsequently apologized for his actions..

Next Time Boston Yells “Yankee’s Suck” I say we ban them from the world series….

“I have to tell you something very Important.”

“Oh My god my have crabs!”

“No…Yes,but thats not the point. Please, I have something important to tell you, meet me at the picnic table in 10 seconds…”

“Hello beth you may recall 10 seconds ago I asked you to meet me here, at the picnic table…”

…….OK you should all get the movie quote, if you don’t? Well then how dare you call yourself a nerd!!! Ok, so you may recall last week I wrote column making a big deal out of the the “Then unknown” Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter…Well First things first. Here is the made for commercial ad for the book (not the film)…Which looks funny as hell. But that is just part of this news..I came down from the mountain and called dibs like Moses…

Tim Burton and Timur Bekmambetov, are teaming up again to produce a project:They’re banging out the JUST released book, Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter by Seth Grahame-Smith, author of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies.

Screen Daily:

reports the deal, but doesn’t have much additional detail. Grahame-Smith will adapt the screenplay from his own novel. Interesting choice, as when an author adapts his own work for the screen there’s always a chance that he won’t be able to get any distance from the material. That can make paring down the text a problematic enterprise. Then again, who better to get inside the material than the creator?