Okay, save for the obvious risk of losing an eye, these coat hooks sort of slay other coat hooks. Also, if you consider the glory of telling the story of the throwing star injury…this is a no-brainer. We haven’t seen these in person yet, but from the photos and description, yes, you could definitely hurt somebody with these. Make your hallway look like you forgot to clean up after your last ninja stand-off.

You may also want to hang some nice Chuck Norris paintings around the place for good measure.

Nerds may be known for wearing lots of logo shirts (they’re free afterall), high waters, pocket protectors and generally UN-stylish wardrobes. But I’m sorry, there has been an evolution, no, Revolution in nerd style. A whole lot of bad-ass artisans have been busy in their workshops cranking out some pretty cool accessories for nerds. Here’s a few favorite picks for the Gamers in the crowd. (Pictured Above: Mario Brothers Cuff Links)

1. For the low price of just $7.49 you get a doubly nerdy little gem here. Not only is this a quality image of a Pac Man Ghost…but its on a SCRABBLE TILE! Yay for that. And what’s stopping you from indulging your inner Mr. T at that price? Go for it…have an Atari mash-up on your chest!

2. This one is NOT cheap, but then…its not cheap. This hand-milled titanium band engraved with “PVP” just screams nerdy sophistication. If you have to ask what “PVP” stands for, well, then you’ll likely not be shelling out the cash for this bad boy. But if you do, I’m pretty certain you’ll attract some hotties who know their way around a joystick.

3. Speaking of Joysticks…check out these little works of perfection! Just picture your iPod cable next to these awesome Atari Joystick Earrings. At the risk of being “crafty” this artist made these cute little controllers out of polymer and liquid polymer clay (chemistry props!), and who would know that the same stuff is used to make hippy dippy Phish parking lot crap-ola. Its refreshing to see science being used for good and not evil!

4. This Space Invaders Bangle made from Resin would go so well with some checkered Vans (which you know you saved from the 80s) and a Big Gulp. Just picture yourself at the 7-11 chillin’ against the soda machine while your man tries to beat your high score. You with your six pieces of Hubba Bubba, blowing giant bubbles and representing with your four or five Space Invader bangles. You’re so cutting edge.

5. So you’re back from  your Pacific Northwest hunt for Yeti and there are a whole lotta nay-sayers telling you to give up your quest for the lost creatures. Screw’em. Show off your in-your-face will to discover the secrets of the mythical beast with this “Believer Shield“. Represent for your fellow believers with this Sterling Silver shield depicting Nessy, Big Foot and a Unicorn. Lumber through the woods in style!

Valentine’s Day for nerds can be a total nightmare. All that romance and charm just doesn’t come easy to the nerd world. But thanks to James Stowe (freelance illustrator) from a galaxy far far away, jedi dorks everywhere have a solution to the quandry. These Valentine’s Day cards will charm the high-waters off any dork! Its pretty certain that when one of these shows up in the hands of any licensed, bonded and insured dweeb, there will be all kinda awkward makin’ out. I mean…Chewbacca holding an Ewok!? I’m melting like a freakin’ box of chocolates right now. Hint hint. Check out more after the jump.

Source: Geekologie

Valentine’s Day is just around the corner and although I hate to participate in promoting a Hallmark holiday, I do think nerds need good romantic gifts. So whether you keep these ideas around for a rainy day or if you want to wow your crush for Valentine’s Day, here goes:

1. Mixed Tape USB — Remember the giddy romance of handing over that mixed tape to your junior high crush? The songs carefully crafted with suggestive titles and songs crammed with personalized references to little details you hoped he or she would pick up on….aaaaaaaah the sweet gesture of a casual — “hey, I made you a mixed tape…” I still have a shoe box with terribly worn out cassettes from yesteryear. But alas, there is a way to bring the retromantic mixed tape back! Not only that, but now you can fit up to 100 mp3s onto your masterpiece! Only $18 here.

2. Home Planetarium — for the star-gazers in the crowd. I bet you can pry your Valentine’s nose out of a book by turning the lights down low and projecting the night sky onto the ceiling. Go grab your Star Wars sleeping bags and curl up with your nerd and watch the constellations fly!

3. Giant Star Wars PEZ dispensers! Twelve inches, because size matters even to NERDS! These over-sized PEZ dispensers play real Star Wars music, Hell yeah! You can give your nerd one for every holiday until they’ve got them all: C-3PO, Chewbacca, Clone Trooper, Darth Vader, Death Star, Emperor Palpatine, General Grievous, R2-D2 and Yoda. How dorkily awesome is that?

4. This one is easy, free and pretty simple: Hug a nerd. Nerds are often under-hugged….I mean think about it. Nerds often interact via the internet, sit in rooms alone playing video games, making plans to take over the world and whatever else they’re doing in those dark buzzing rooms. See what I mean? Not much hug-getting is going on for a whole lotta nerds out there. So if you want to give the gift that a nerd will find truly unusual, human contact will do the trick!

5. For the nerd who likes something useful, why not combine digital technology with the engineering genius of the Swiss Army knife? Now while your nerd whittles away his or her time browsing the web for the best deals on video games, they can literally whittle! Dang!

6. You will never convince me that nerds  play with their balls any less than their non-nerd counterparts. So here’s a wonderful way to tell your nerd you love them enough to encourage said playing with of balls. Also, its wicked cool to have RARE EARTH magnets. So…your nerd should get on board anyway. Why? well, besides the whole rare earth power thing, this is an insanely addictive time-waster. Nerds love that.

7. So after you’ve set your USB casette to “play” and dinner hits the table, what next to wow your nerd Valentine? I live for those rare moments when my nerd Valentine has that look of “oooooooh, I didn’t see THAT coming!” Since my Valentine will be reading this before I have the chance to try it out, let me know what happens when you pop open the wine and the cork is also…..dun Dun DUN: a thumb drive!!!! Seriously great. Wine. Technology. My two greatest inanimate loves.

8. Er, ummmmm, I almost hesitate to suggest this, but why not just use some body paint? You really don’t have to commit to the tattoo, but if you REALLY want to, well….that’s on you. If you go for this option, you are excused from all the other stuff. It will be lost on your saucer-eyed nerd.

9. Trying to make new little nerds, but can’t seem to INTERFACE with your nerd? Here’s a little HINT HINT jump drive. You can only hope that your nerd will pick up on the underlying message.

10. You win all nerd contests if you pry this cloak from this guy. Hands-down you’re getting so much nerd action if you present this to your nerd. You may be scarred from fighting the owner of this amazing nerd cloak…because I bet he also has Freddy Kruger’s actual blade hands and um, lots of other really violent stuff.

I just ran across this awesome seller on Etsy. From his bio:

I was born in Gallup New Mexico August 31, 1959. I was given some plastiline type clay (oil based clay) when I was very young around two or three years of age and found that my God had bestowed on me a talent even at this every age.

Well, that talent comes with some awesome taste! For you steampunk fans out there, you’ll be delighted at the price of these robots too…just $45 to $70! They’re made from chrome and other various metals, some of which is reclaimed. Nerd points go to this guy for spending his time and efforts making robots we can all fall in love with! More robots after the jump.

If you can’t get enough of these cute little Steampunk Robots, be sure to visit the Etsy shop: Punkbots and see what else this artist has been up to.

Not sure if you know, but there’s been a movement for the last several years to bring knitting to the street. You’ve seen spray-painted graffiti, murals, sculptures and all kinds of other forms of subversive “street” art. But have you seen the latest craze hitting the street? Check out some Guerilla Knitting going on where you’d least expect it.

1. Shipyard Cozy. The best part about this is that I’ll bet that metal is really cold. Its these acts of kindness that will save us from the robots when the Apocalypse comes…or whenever robots take over.

2. Tree Sweater. Looking out my window today I feel a little ashamed. I’ve got all this yarn just sitting in drawers and shelves and my trees are f@#king cold! I hope they don’t get all Tolkien on my ass and start planning my demise. Yikes. There are a lot of naked trees out there people. I would hate to think of what will happen if the trees join the robots!

3. “Knitta Please” — Knittas, according to wikipedia and everywhere else you see these images, are a rogue group of anonymous knitters. And they’re all kinda crafty, yo. So don’t get up in their grill, bitches.

4. Bus Sweaters. Maybe it looks cool, maybe not, but I bet they don’t need to turn on the heater. You have to admire the execution on this one. I bet it was a lot of sleepless knitnerd nights figuring out the giant granny square. I wonder if the bus was cooperative about trying it on over and over during the whole process.

5. A Real Gas. I want to say this makes the neighborhood more beautiful. I really do. I want to love this, and I probably do. But I think I see quilting mixed in. And Santa. And I don’t know if I’m ready for this kind of combining of the Guerrilla crafting. I like to think the quilters are still indoors, sewing away memory quilts while the knittas be out in the street. Maybe I just need more time.

6. Fashion Week NYC. — What girl or post wouldn’t dream of spending Fashion Week in NYC!? The lights, the stars, the cute shoes….the glamour!

7. Statue Scarf. Finally. Somebody did something about those out-dates statue outfits. Seriously, patina is cool, but punch up the color on these park sculptures with a cute scarf! I mean, duh.

8. Door handle cover. You say door handle cozy, I say H1N1 is lurking. This is cute and all, but ew the germs.  How many unwashed hands will grip this thing, leaving behind uncleanable bacteria and every other cause of infection. But it is cute. Also its a great starter project for the novice!

9. Bike Hugger. No really, that’s what its called. My only criticism…maybe they should have added a zipper. Because although the bike will surely be cozy in chilly weather, its going to take awhile to remove this for your ride home from the bar. And yes, I am assuming this knitter is a drunk.

10. Statue Warmer. I know that whatever clothing this poor statue gets is a blessing. But if it was up to me, I’d have suggested a smart pant suit.

* Click on Images to view sources.

** Skull Hat at the top was knitted by Carrol Mick who makes up lots of patterns like it! Thanks Carrol for triggering the idea for this list.

If you want to purchase a skull hat, they are available here with or without ear flaps and once you order you can request whatever colors you want.

The magic of the Unicorn has stolen my words. Most writers experience a lack of words once or twice in their careers, and I am battling the overwhelming inner silence at this very moment. Please join me here in my cone of silence. Semi-naked man unicorning. This video doubles as birth control too, just a handy hint. I repeat: I just don’t have words for this yet.

I’ve been sitting here in front of this blank page wondering how long to give myself to come up with the right thing to say about what you presumably just watched. But what I think I’d be better off doing is planning some kind of “Nerds Unite, Take Back the Unicorn” event for all of us who survived it. Because we will be re-living it for years and years to come. I just have so many questions. So many questions.

Then the silence becomes deafening:

It is going to take courage to let the healing begin. This time, the unicorn cannot help us. This time, we cannot call upon the Samurai. Dare I ask how many times you’ve already watched these videos by the time you’re reading these words?

Here’s a little something for dessert if you didn’t get enough “Goodbye Horses” put to disturbing dances involving pelts and what-not.

A poetic glance at the ABCs  of the nerd’s brain. Sing along with me!

A is for Alf and Alderon and Atari

B is for Battlestar Gallactica and Batman and Binary

C is for Crossbows & Catapults and Conventions and Cosplay

D is for Droids and D&D and Deathstar

E is for Elves and Eczema and Erector Sets

F is for Flood-pants and Fruit Roll-ups and Final Fantasy VII

G is for Gandolf and Gremlins and GPA

H is for Ham Radio and Halo and Han Solo

I is for IT Department and Indoors and Inhalers

J is for Jabba and Joystick and Jedis

K is for Krull and Klingon and Krypton

L is for Luke and Leia and Ligers

M is for Math and Middle Earth and Mario

N is for Narnia and Nintendo and Nanu Nanu

O is for Orks and Ovaltine and Obi Wan

P is for Puzzles and Prime Directives and Pac Man

Q is for Q and Quark and QWERTY

R is for R2D2 and Ren Faires and Robots

S is for Star Trek and Star Wars and Shozbot

T is for Tolkien and Trombones and Tempest

U is for Uhura and U.S.S. Enterprise and Uncle Owen

V is for V and Vapo-Rub and Virginity

W is for World of Warcraft and Wizards and WWW

X is for Specs and Rays and Box

Y is for Yeti and Yar and Yo-Yos

Z is for Zombies and Zelda and Zits

“I like to draw monsters, gargantuan spaceships, tiny people, huge people, crab-like aliens, tubes, unfortunate biomechanics, sleek cars, strange fashion, and crates of varying shapes and sizes.” — Ray Lederer

Ray Lederer, illustrator, concept artist and all-around sci-fi nerd happily draws creatures and monsters all day….and he gets payed to do it. Not only that, he’s worked for some of entertainment’s biggest players including DC, Marvel, and Sony contributing to Star Wars, Tales from the Crypt RPG and Battletech/Mechwarrior RPG books and now Bathesda (of Fallout fame). Cool, in a totally nerdy way. That’s why he’s January pick for Nerd of the Month.

Watch along below as Ray works his magic, and I’ll meet you afterwards for some Q&A with our nerdy little art star of the video game world:

Nerdbastards: What is your all-time favorite Video Game?

Lederer: It would probably have to be Battlefield 1942. I don’t play too many games anymore but that’s the one I occasionally go back to consistently. It’s got all the fun of a giant snowball fight but with airplanes, tanks, and ships.

Nerdbastards: What is your all-time favorite movie?

Lederer: That is almost impossible to answer so I’ll say Star Wars since that’s the film that really sent my imagination flying at an early age.

Nerdbastards: Have you ever been fired?

Lederer: Yes. I had just begun getting some freelance work early in my career at about the same time I’d gotten a Christmas job at Waldenbooks as a retail clerk. I had such a tight deadline that I needed to take some time off
immediately like 3 days before Christmas. I had to hold the phone a couple feet away from my ear when I told my manager I wasn’t coming in that afternoon. Needless to say the next time I went in was to collect my last check.

Nerdbastards: What was your favorite toy when you were a kid…and do you still have it?

Lederer: Hmmm… probably my Daisy BB gun. I have no idea where it is now.

Nerdbastards: Who is your favorite artist?

Lederer: That is almost impossible to answer as well. The list is so long and ever changing.Right now I’m really diggin’ on Greg Manchess.

Nerdbastards: What really gives you the creeps?

Lederer: Southern rock.

Nerdbastards: What do you want people to know about your games/company

Lederer: Just that it’s an absolute pleasure to come into work every day. It’s challenging and difficult sometimes but the rewards creatively are great. The level of talent here is exceptional and it drives me to become a better artist.

Nerdbastards: Do you dance?

Lederer: Yep!

Nerdbastards: Who impresses you within the gaming industry?

Lederer: I can only speak from firsthand experience. If you mean on an individual level some of my closest friends are also those I find most impressive in the field. That list is long but who comes to mind immediately is Adam Adamowicz (my co-worker on and off for the last 10+ years)who sits right next to me and is responsible for some of the coolest stuff in Fallout3.

Nerdbastards: Do you think it is okay to lie in interviews?

Lederer: Only to save a friend.

Check out more about January’s Nerd of the Month Ray Lederer here at his website and keep up with his goings-on here at his blog!

Thanks to Ray Lederer for your contribution and cooperation.

Here’s some additional eye candy for you!

]]> http://nerdbastards.com/2010/01/26/januarys-nerd-of-the-month-profile-fallout-concept-artist-ray-lederer/feed/ 1 http://nerdbastards.com/2010/01/26/fist-pumps-and-mustaches-super-mario-bros-meets-jersey-shore/ http://nerdbastards.com/2010/01/26/fist-pumps-and-mustaches-super-mario-bros-meets-jersey-shore/#comments Tue, 26 Jan 2010 17:53:33 +0000 Melissa Fouch http://nerdbastards.com/?p=8308

Nerds + The Situation = Awesomeness. The only thing that would improve this Super Mario Bros/Jersey Shore mash-up: the real cast of Jersey Shore. Really, what else would THE REAL CAST OF JERSEY SHORE actually IMPROVE? One hand clapping, right? Check out what would go down if Super Mario Bros. & company landed on the Jersey Shore. I hereby request a re-make with the real cast of the show, seriously. Just put the real cast in the house with the characters and let the cameras roll. I bet not much would end up on the cutting room floor of that shoot.

Jersey Shore: Super Mario Bros. – Watch more free videos