Now that Canada has clearly solved all social, economic and, political issues its government can finally settle in and solve the problem of all the damn zombies. Wednesday in the House of Commons (where government is made) Foreign Affairs Minister John Baird laid down the nations stance on the walking dead.
“Canada will never be a safe haven for zombies.“
This was in response to questions from an opposition MP grilling the minister on the countries Zombie preparedness. Yes. This actually happened. NDP MP Pat Martin started the political discourse of the dead with this.
“I don’t need to tell you, Mr. Speaker, that zombies don’t don’t recognize borders and that a zombie invasion in the United States can easily turn into a continent-wide pandemic if it is not contained, so on behalf of concerned Canadians everywhere, I want to ask the Minister for Foreign Affairs, is he working with his American counterparts to develop an international zombie strategy so that a zombie invasion does not turn into a zombie apocalypse?”
So rest easy Canadians, your government has everything under control. When the dead rise there will be no interruption of hockey. The bacon deliveries will all happen on time. Zombies will never overrun the great white North!
For the historians out there, we have provided video evidence of this historical declaration below. It’s like CSPAN, only more polite.
You know you have a real nerd-sized hard-on for a fictional character when you write a song for said character. Or you’re a really fuckin’ sad loner. Either way, Canadian singer-songwriter James Struthers definitely has some of that crazy shit going down. James’ newest video, “You, Me and Optimus Prime”, is the closest we may ever get to a bromance between human and autobot that won’t be filed in with the spank bank on your computer. (Or will it?)
Even if you’re not a fan of this kind of music, it’s well worth it to watch Optimus piss gasoline onto a fire. That’s right: Optimus Prime pissing on a fire and making it bigger. (By “it”, I mean the fire, you sick fucks!) If that’s the only reason you’d be interested in watching this video, so be it. Just fuckin’ watch it! And, y’know, if watching Struthers and Optimus Prime fuck around all day is something that gets you going… We aren’t judging. (Yes, we are.)
There’s a brand new show coming to Space celebrating everything that’s great about being a fan.. it’s called Fanboy Confessional. The show features a different “fandom” each week and follows around a few people devoted to that passion. There’s horror week, steampunk week, furry week and more!
Sounds pretty fuckin’ awesome (and definitely better than Dashboard Confessional). Check out the trailer below!
Being Canadian, I’m ashamed to say that I hadn’t heard of this series until now… but I’ll definitely be keeping an eye out for it! Check this page out for more deets.
Super Hero Round Up? All the little Superhero movie and news bits that you should know about, but just can’t make a full post on their own. Sneaks peaks in this roundup includes the Avengers teaser poster, the original Superman Returns opening sequence, everything you want to know about Fear itself and Flashpoint, a new Spiderman Edge of Time trailer, cardboard super hero costumes, Dark Knight Rises teaser gets animated and a Captain Canuck film in development.
San Diego Comic-con News: The Avengers Teaser Poster
Coming straight from the official site for Marvel’s The Avengers the official teaser poster has been released to the public, right in time for Comic-con. Continuing the epic big-screen adventures started in Iron Man, The Incredible Hulk, Iron Man 2, Thor and Captain America: The First Avenger, this is Marvel’s brass ring-dipped in gold and sprinkled with awesome.
When an unexpected enemy emerges that threatens global safety and security, Nick Fury, director of the international peacekeeping agency known as S.H.I.E.L.D., finds himself in need of a team to pull the world back from the brink of disaster. Written and directed by Joss Whedon, the action adventure stars Robert Downey Jr., Chris Hemsworth, Chris Evans, Jeremy Renner, Mark Ruffalo, Scarlett Johansson, Clark Gregg, Samuel L. Jackson, Cobie Smulders, Tom Hiddleston, Stellan Skarsgard and Amanda Righetti. The Avengers hit theaters everywhere May 4, 2012.
Being a fellow Canadian citizen it’s well known we are made fun of for a few things in the world. We are made fun of for our accents, or lumberjacks and our hockey teams (admit it, we kinda suck right now) but our superheros are the ones that really take it on the chin. Hell, our biggest hero outside of the great white north was DueSouth‘s Benton Fraser and his only power was lasting longer on TV then he should have. The only thing going good for us maple lover’s is Wolverine and that’s only because he’s a true Canadian ladies man, stiffer then the adamantium in his bones and never calls them back. With all this hate for the country of red and white who will save us now? How about the ‘Hero’s of The North’, the next big thing in Canada making those Alpha flight shirts cool again (yeah right).
Coming from the city of poutine (yummy) and adult situations (yummier) Montreal, Quebec’s own “Hero’s of The North” is an online series based on a (fictional) division of the Canadian military. While the real military isn’t as cool, we’re rocking 3 subs though, this secret division called the CDO (Canadian Defense Organization) would probably make up for what we suck at if they were real. This isn’t any normal series however as Hero’s of The North is told through various forms for it’s online masses. Told through 20 live action webisodes, 8 comic books, a diary, video games (in the works), characters tech sheets, characters facebook pages, and many universe related websites, this just shows that we can run with an idea and turn it into gold (or at least something cool). Sure, the acting is something to be desired but what do you expect, people to start quoting Shakespeare on the fly, it usually depends on who’s playing what. As for everything else, from the sets to the story it more then makes up for the faulty acting here and there.
Don’t believe this fellow Canuck right now, why don’t you check out this trailer. It might change your mind about cracking those igloo jokes for a while.
Be sure to check out the Hero’s of The North website for everything Hero
Being a fellow Canadian this just tickles my sides with delight just to bring this story to readers in America. Every super hero movie released in the last 5 years has been about an America with super powers, sure there’s Wolverine Origins, but that doesn’t count based on the fact that it sucked. Every hero on screen has been holding his green card since birth and it’s about time to take the super hero up north. Heroes have come from nearly every single state, but have you heard of a hero coming from Nova Scotia? Alberta? I don’t think so. Canada has it’s own super heroes too and it’s about time that the hero representing the nation of the beaver, hockey, and uncensored boobs gets his time on the silver screen.
Who is this red and white wonder?
This is going to sound very stereotypical but Captain Canuck, created back in 1975, has a huge cult following in both Canada and America. Created by writer Ron Leishman and artist/co-writer Richard Comely Captain Canuck has been described as a union between Captain America and Flash Gordon. Captain Canuck patrols Canada in the futuristic world of 1993, where “Canada had become the most powerful country in the world.” Yeah, it’s a stretch but a country can dream that it’s the one riding on top can’t they. A costumed agent of CSIS (Canadian Secret Intelligence Services) not to be confused with Alpha Flight‘s Guardian, looking like long lost twins from a Dr. Phil special
Comely recently spoke with Hero Complex about the Maple loving hero making his way into Hollywood. According to Comely:
He is close to striking a deal with a Canadian production company to make a $15-million live-action version of the comic. He would not say which company he is in discussions with.
The rumored company is a Toronto based group know as Sinking Ship Productions Inc. As for what could happen to the movie we already know it won’t happen in 1993.
If the movie deal does come to fruition, Comely said Captain Canuck will surprise fans accustomed to the fiery violence and high-tech gizmos that define the American masked-men movies. “I wanted him to be as real as possible,” Comely said in a phone interview from Ontario. “He’s polite, by the way. Just a little bit gentler.”
Of course Captain Canuck is polite, he’s a god damn Canadian, the only difference is when he punches you in the face he’ll pick up back up and say “sorry” only to punch you again. He may be our hero but that doesn’t mean he’s a heartless. Yet what iteration of Captain Canuck will audiences actually see? There have been 3 Canucks since his inception in 75, so just who could be slipping into the red and white spandex?
Comely said it’s unclear which Captain Canuck would appear in the movie.
Awesome, a small budget Canadian super hero hopefully hitting viewers everywhere soon. He’ll be able to finally break all those bad sterotypes that the world is always talking aboot, eh?
Oh boy!! There is nothing I want more then to have an XBOX signed by Sarah Palin…actually, there is one thing I want more…I want cupcakes!!!!…And then I want to spend $1,100,000.00 and wait 5 days for the ebay auction to end so I can own this stupid thing… (more…)