Daenerys

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Every day the internet produces an astounding amount of goodies and gems. Most hilarious, some amusing, but all worth at least a few seconds of your time. We here at Nerd Bastards try to bring you the best bits of news and nerdery the webz has to offer, with a bit of snark thrown in. But sometimes not everything makes the cut. Monday through Friday we’ll be bringing you our inbox leftovers, our forgotten bookmarks, the nerdy bits that simply slipped through the cracks. You can submit items to Nerdy Bits by emailing us at nerdybits@nerdbastards.com.

ABOVE: Australian model and Nerd Bastards fan Isabelle Deltore  wanted to say hello from down under.  [Isabelle Deltore]

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danydragon

When the third season of Game of Thrones returns this weekend the most noticeable difference will be the size of Daenerys’ dragons. No longer are they small and cute and capable of chillin’ on Dany’s shoulder. No no, these dragons are growing, and this latest promo for Thrones offers our best look at them yet,

How cool is that final shot of them souring above, I believe, Astapor, the city where she’ll seek to purchase an army of slaves. They look fantastic, don’t they? I knew these dragons had to get bigger for this season as they become a much more valuable weapon in Dany’s arsenal, but I wasn’t sure how far HBO would go. Doesn’t look like they’re pulling any of their punches, these dragons look fierce!

Hit the jump for another video of David Benioff and Dan Weiss chatting more about what’s coming in Season 3, plus a hilarious historical recap of the Targaryen family.

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Game-of-Thrones-Season-3-trailer-has-finally-arrived

Reporting live from Westeros – I wish – here’s the latest news concerning the quest to rule the Seven Kingdoms and sit upon the Iron Throne. Daenerys Stormborn, or rather, Emilia Clarke has demanded of George R.R. Martin to know who the final victor will be come the end of A Song of Ice and Fire, the book series that spurred HBO‘s wildly successful Game of Thrones. Speaking with Metro News, Clarke said,

I’ve said to George ‘come on, tell me who wins, please!’ And he thinks I’m joking and I say, ‘no, no, I’m deadly serious! His lips are sealed. And I’m sure that David [Benioff] and Dan [Weiss] know but they don’t tell anyone –I’ve got them drunk and they still wouldn’t tell me.

I’ve been pleading with them, ‘tell me who wins!’ And they won’t say a word. They’re under lock and key! But I care passionately about what happens to Dany. How could I not?

I hear ya, girl. My money’s on Dany. I mean, come on, woman’s got dragons, how could she not win? We’ll continue to see Dany and her dragons as Game of Thrones is very likely continuing for a fourth season. It’s kind of a no brainer, Thrones is HBO’s most successful show, ever, why not keep it going? And we know Benioff and Weiss had already planned to split the events of the third book, A Storm of Swords, into two seasons. It’d be a crime to leave us hanging after what they’ve got planned for the third season. But if you’re looking for confirmation, Tywin Lannister, Charles Dance, said this during a press conference for Season 2’s release on DVD/Blu-ray,

We’re about to start season four aren’t we? This year. We get scripts pretty early on, much earlier on than in similar series, usually you get perhaps one episode and you just have to trust that what’s going to come in subsequent episodes is going to be as good as the one you’ve got, but in this I think there are six scripts already written, and we will probably be able to see them with more than adequate time to prepare before we start shooting.

Which basically seals the deal, Game of Thrones will return for a fourth season, even if HBO hasn’t officially made a statement saying so. Would the Hand of the King lie?

No, but he doesn’t bat an eyelash at “kinky fuckery.” Here’s the venerable actor reading an excerpt from 50 Shades of Grey, in case you missed it,

Hit the jump for more Game of Thrones news, including “The Bear and the Maiden Fair”, an awesome interactive map from Direct TV, and look at this, it’s Cersei’s dream coming true,

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We’ve been covering the filming of Game of Thrones‘ Season 3 as they’ve progressed from Croatia (King’s Landing) to Morocco, which is standing in for the locations of Daenerys’ (Emilia Clarke) travels in the East. This season it’s Slaver’s Bay in Astapor. We’ve already had our first glimpse of Slaver’s Bay, but today, unearthed on Game of Thrones‘ extra and Swedish kickboxer Rickard Nordstrand‘s Twitter page are these shots he took in Morocco. They’re are first really good looks at Ed Skrein as Daario Naharis and Nathalie Emmanuel as Missandei.

Were you to dig a little deeper there are some SPOILERS to uncover, so if you like to avoid those turn back now.

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What If ‘Game of Thrones’ Had Political Attack Ads

This is the closest that this NerdBastard ever wants to get to posting political crap on anything related to NerdBastards. We all get enough of that crap in everyday life and let’s face it, nothing anyone says on the Internet is really gonna change the way we each individually think about politics and life.

YouTube user MotherjonesVideo has put together two pretty damn close to actual political ads one would see in an old fashioned mud slinging campaign. One can just imagine the town crier ringing a bell and yelling, at the top of his lungs, these ads at passing peasants, noblemen, and noble ladies.


10 Mothers You Don’t Mess With

Mother’s day is fast approaching . . . it’s this Sunday dude . . . that’s tomorrow. If you haven’t planned and taken care of your Mother’s Day Duties: cards, flowers, candies, breakfast in bed, dinner out, then you had better get on the ball and get it done.

So let’s take a look at some of Nerdom’s moms that you wouldn’t want to mess with for one reason or another.

Mama Fratelli – The Goonies

The best way to sum up this NerdBastards feelings towards Mama Fratelli is to say that she be happy to drive you around house to house to trick or treat on Halloween, then take your bag of candy when you got home. Favorite Mama Fratelli quote:

Mouth: Is this supposed to be water?
Mama Fratelli: It’s wet, ain’t it? Drink it!

 

Flemeth – Dragon Age

Voiced by: Kate Mulgrew

Flemeth is the legendary “Witch of the Wilds.” Why is she on the list? Well, how about conceiving and raising her daughter only so Flemeth could invade and take over her daughter’s body, destroying Morrigan’s soul and living forever or at least until she needed another replacement body. That’s some hardcore motherly love.

 

Mom – Futurama

Mom owns and manages 99.7% of MomCorp, a large, multi-billion dollar industrial complex with numerous subsidiaries and a monopoly on robot production. Publicly, she retains the image of a sweet, bustling old woman who often slips into the stereotype of a hapless grandmother (she wears antiquated clothes that greatly accentuate her bust and general figure, while using rustic metaphors such as “squeaking like an old screen door”). Behind the scenes, however, she is malevolent, foul-mouthed, chain-smoking, cold-hearted, and narcissistic. She routinely abuses her sons and others, verbally and physically, like the minions she sees them to be.

 

Mystique – Marvel Comics X-men

Abandon one child to a band of traveling circus gypsies while raising another foster child to be a super villain destroying your enemies. This chick is mother Teresa material. Sure she can look like anyone at any time . . . except on Mother’s day when she is no where to be found.

 

Alien Queen – Aliens

The mother of all space monster mothers. She is one mother you don’t want mess with or threaten her offspring. She will gut you faster than an Ahi-tuna sushi chef. Ripley said it best:

“You know, Burke, I don’t know which species is worse. You don’t see them fucking each other over for a goddamn percentage.”

 

Shaft – Shaft 

He’s a bad mutha . . .

SHUT YO MOUTH ! ! !

I’m just talkin bout Shaft.

 

Cersi “Lannister” Baratheon – Game of Thrones

If a mother can be judged by the quality of her children then Cersi has a lot of explaining to do. She tells her child that everyone is an enemy and no one can deny him anything. How can she be surprised when that child turns into the most hated character in the whole George R.R. Martin series. The only character in the whole series seen trying to teach Joffery something is his uncle Tyrion, by then it’s way too late.

Tyrion: “You love your children. It’s your one redeeming quality; that and your cheekbones.”

 

Lori Grimes – The Walking Dead

Where’s Carl, Lori?

WHERE THE FRACK IS CARL?!?!?!

I’ll tell ya . . .

HE”S POKING A ZOMBIE WITH A STICK IN THE WOODS BY HIMSELF!!!

If I had a nickel for every time Lori had no idea where her child Carl was I could afford that Riot Shotgun I have my eye on for Zombie protection. Once the zombie apocalypse starts I think that knowing where your children are at all times would pretty much top a Mother’s List of Duties. Wait, she can’t be that bad. When she learned that her husband was not back from town yet she jumped into a car and drove after him (WHERE”S CARL LORI?!?!). Of course she did manage to crash the car when she was the ONLY CAR IN OPERATION ON THE ROADS IN THE STATE OF GEORGIA AT THE TIME. This NerdBastard has taken Lori off the carpool list.

 

Sarah Conner – Terminator Franchise 

When Sarah Conner finds out her child will one day save mankind from the robot apocalypse she doesn’t curl up into a ball and wait for the end. She steps up, buffs up, and arms up. She’s willing to do what ever it takes to keep her son (and Mankind) safe, she is willing to take a bullet, grenade, or sliver metal Terminator finger blade to keep John safe. Get in her way and you will soon realize your mistake.

 

Daenerys Targaryen – Game of Thrones

“I am Daenerys Stormborn and I will take what is mine, with fire and blood.”

She is the mother of dragons. She will eat the bloody hearts of her enemies to protect her children, or at least some bloody horse heart. It’s hard to say much more without throwing spoilers out there so this NerdBastard is gonna just leave it there.

Every day the internet produces an astounding amount of goodies and gems. Most hilarious, some amusing, but all worth at least a few seconds of your time. We here at Nerd Bastards try to bring you the best bits of news and nerdery the webz has to offer, with a bit of snark thrown in. But sometimes not everything makes the cut. Monday through Friday we’ll be bringing you our inbox leftovers, our forgotten bookmarks, the nerdy bits that simply slipped through the cracks. You can submit items to Nerdy Bits by emailing us at nerdybits@nerdbastards.com.

ABOVE: Game of Thrones Daenerys  (Disney Version). Very cute, but Y U NO put Mushu? [badassdigest]

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Guys, there’s only 18 more days until Game of Thrones returns to HBOApril 1st will be here before we know it! Which is great, because with The Walking Dead ending this weekend we’ll need a new series to obsess over, stat.

The internet has been littered with images and trailers hyping the return of the epic fantasy series and now, thanks to The Wrap, we’ve got some details and plot summaries for the first five episodes. They’re not super spoilery, but they do contain specifics so if you’d like to remain untainted, I wouldn’t look at ’em. Otherwise, we have some character profiles for Daenerys, Jon Snow, Renly Baratheon, and Joffrey, as well as a video about the weaponry of Westeros below the cut. Just jump to the end to skip the episode summaries.

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