Well, here we go again.  It was reported today that Twisted Pictures has picked up the rights for The Texas Chainsaw Massacre franchise.  Twisted most well known for the Saw franchise, is planning to “contemporize”  the Texas Chainsaw story for a 3D format.  Contemporize?  Is that even a fucking word?  If there was an emoticon for a self inflicted shotgun blast to the face I would be inserting it here.  If  it couldn’t get any worse, well it does the film will be penned by Stephen Susco(The Grudge).  So I guess this is what we got to look forward to…  

We start off with a faceless ghost running through a series of traps, set up by a puppet on a tricycle only to be chainsawed in half by a half robot Matthew McConaughey.  The twist is, the ghost was really dead the whole time.  Jesus, I’ve given up on letting myself become angry at all these blasphemous remakes.  Seriously though, this a a down right sin against any fan of the medium of film.  I kinda liked Marcus Nispel’s remake of Texas  Chainsaw  and his remake of Friday The Thirteenth was very reverent to the original. Plus, I have high hopes for Nightmare On Elm Street as well but, for fuck sake leave Texas Chainsaw Massacre alone, it’s been done.  How about you guys go make Saw In Space or Saw Back To Da Hood. 


Category: Film

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