Welcome to another edition of “Ask the Bastards,” the weekly feature where you the readers get to ask us anything and we get to attempt to impart some wisdom (though usually we’re just cracking dirty jokes). This week we tackle questions about the Rocketeer reboot, why Firefly is so popular, what it would take for our favorite shows to spin out of control and where we stand on the eternal DC. vs. Marvel comics battle.

Got a question for us? Be sure to Follow Us on Twitter or Like Us on Facebook. We put out the call for questions every week, so watch for your chance.

Do you have hopes for the Rocketeer movie reboot? – Adam

That it doesn’t happen? –Jason Tabrys

Only that Christina Hendricks plays Jenny and has an extended “Betty Paige” like photo shoot. –  Mark Poynter

My only hope is that Micheal Bay directs and has a career ending incident with an exploding rocket pack. – Luke Gallagher

I always have hope for films based on things I like, but I’d still rather see everyone just go back and watch the original and realize how underrated it is. – Matthew Jackson

Yeah, I’m where Matthew is, except to say that my hope in there being a remake is to prompt people to do just that: go back and check out the original. The original Rocketeer is a sorely under-appreciated gem in the ’90s studio grind factory. It’s a thrilling adventure movie about an ordinary man that finds a rocket pack and fights the mob and Nazis. It had young Jennifer Connelly decked out in 40s glam. It had Alan Arkin as the hero’s inventor friend. It had pre-CG old school effects. It had Timothy Dalton doing a 180 on his James Bond persona playing a Nazi spy. It had Terry O’Quinn as Howard Hughes. And it had the cool Nazi jetpack men invaders animation that looked like it came right out of the mind of Walt Disney himself. Forget the remake, and go and get the Blu-ray. – Adam A. Donaldson

Is The Dark Knight Rises better than Batman Begins? – Marc

I think it was a more complete film and I preferred the scale of its ending over the way the conflict was resolved in DKR. With that said, you can’t beat that last… oh, you know. – Jason Tabrys

Hmm, that’s a tough one. Thinking it over, I keep leaning towards The Dark Knight. Primarily because of Heath Ledger’s Joker. There’s just something so fascinating about a psychopathic, mass murdering, schizophrenic clown with zero empathy. I particularly liked the line “”Introduce a little anarchy – upset the established order, and everything becomes chaos. I’m an agent of chaos. And you know the thing about chaos – it’s fair.”  I think the whole order vs. chaos theme, on top of Ledger’s performance, makes The Dark Knight stand above the other 2 films. With that said, I really enjoyed The Dark Knight Rises. There were a lot more things to like than in the previous installments. Namely John Blake, Catwoman and Bane, 3 new characters that each, in their own right, stole the show. Not to mention Michael Caine’s tear jerking “I’m done” monologue. That was powerful stuff. I also thought Christian Bale was a more convincing Batman this time around.  Instead of a stupid love triangle (previous flick) he actually had something to fight for this time. The character lost everything and had to go through a whole Rocky-esque training sequence to “rise” above.

The only reason TDKR wasn’t the better of the three films, is because of the disconnections in logic (characters showing up out of nowhere and conveniently being in the right place at the right time) and the overall theme. Economic inequality just wasn’t as interesting in comparison to what people do in times of chaos. –Luke Gallagher

While TDKR is one of the more action oriented flicks in the Nolan trilogy I have to go against popular opinion and say that Batman Begins is the better of the two. Not for what it was, but what it represented: a new beginning for the Batman film franchise and a new direction to take the audience. Honestly, every other Batman movie after Batman Returns sucked batwang. So to see Christian Bale take the icon into a more serious role outside of nips on the batsuit and the Batman Discover card was a breath of fresh air. – Nick Bungay

YesBatman Begins is the best first superhero film ever made, but it has the disadvantage of being all about the establishing of themes. The brilliance of bringing it all full circle doesn’t come until The Dark Knight Rises. – Matthew Jackson

Sarah, why is it that nerdy chicks are so much hotter than your standard run of the mill female? – Jonathan

Dammit Jonathan, by only asking Sarah this question you’ve gone and hurt Luke’s fragile feelings. He’s a sensitive guy and now he keeps asking me questions about “manscape-ing” and pedicures. Could you throw the guy a bone and tell him he’s sexy too? – Mark Poynter

I think Luke is sexy. – Jason Tabrys

Thank you Jason. Imma go stand in front of a mirror, tuck my junk back and dance to “Goodbye Horses“. Would you fuck me? I’d fuck me. –Luke Gallagher

Sarah’s not around to answer this week, but we’ll see if we can get to her to fill in her response to this next week.  – Matthew Jackson

Ok this is just random: I want to know some of your most creative ideas on how some of your fav nerdy shows and movies could jump the shark. – Alex

Big Bang Theory, Penny finally breaks the tension of “will they, won’t they” we’ve all had to endure for the last five seasons, kills Sheldon and finally moves in with Leonard. Credits. –Nick Bungay

On Fringe, the Observers and the Strangers from Dark City turn out to be one and the same. – Adam A. Donaldson

Every Walking Dead episode ends with Rick pointing a gun at someone in a tense standoff. Also, no one ever knows where Carl is. – Matthew Jackson

I have a few. 1. If Dexter were to run into Walter “Heisenberg” White. 2. If all the wonderful things that happened in Adventure Time were nothing but dreams from an in-coma Finn. 3. If on The Walking Dead, Rick and Merle have a stub hand fight (according to the comic, Rick is supposed to lose his hand via the Governor).  – Luke Gallagher

DC or Marvel? – Robin

Image and Dark Horse. – Jason Tabrys

^^Seconded^^ – With a dash of anything Ed Brubaker. Mark Poynter

I think Joss Whedon said it best: “DC’s characters, like Wonder Woman and Superman and Green Lantern, were all very much removed from humanity. Batman was the only character they had who was so rooted in pain, that had that same gift that the Marvel characters had, which was that gift of humanity that we can relate to.” So, yeah, my answer is Marvel. – Luke Gallagher

I don’t understand people who have a cultish reaction to either. First of all, I couldn’t live without both Batman and The Avengers in my reading rotation. Second, there are more than enough indie comics you should be reading, so if you’re really worried about which of the Big Two to go with, just choose neither and read whatever the hell you want. (And yeah, go over to the Image section and pick up Saga, Fatale and The Manhattan Projects. Now) – Matthew Jackson

It’s an impossible question because at any one time, either Marvel and DC are doing something interesting or compelling with their books while the other is playing catch-up. For some consistently interesting reads, I would recommend some of the books from BOOM! Comics. -Adam A. Donaldson

Do you think Firefly spawned such a ridiculous hardcore cult following BECAUSE of its truncated network run, or IN SPITE of it? – Jan

I saw the show after its initial run on DVD — hell, I saw it after I saw Serenity, so for me I love it based on its merits not its dashed potential. – Jason Tabrys

I do think that the cancellation helped the shows overall mystique. The quality of the acting and writing is what really drives the word of mouth. Everyone loves to have some favorite show to recommend that people may not have seen before and Firefly fits that bill to a tee. It also has a fairly easy cross-genre appeal. – Mark Poynter

If you think about what happened with Buffy, the sixth and seventh seasons are widely considered the show’s most controversial; some people love them, others hate them. I think if Firefly were around that long, there would be similar difficult feelings. Unlike a lot of first year shows, Firefly had its $#!% together from day one, it had a voice and it spoke with it well, which is why its early cancellation was all the more tragic. Personally, I’m glad it flamed out rather than faded away. I saw Serenity, I was satisfied with the Firefly saga being completed. – Adam A. Donaldson

Firefly is beloved because Firefly is good, but I would agree that there is some element of fan intensity that derives from the frustration that more episodes don’t exist. – Matthew Jackson

What can we do to force a release of “Knights of Badassdom”? – Steven

Rate the Bastardcast on iTunes and excuse blatant, vomit inducing plugs. – Jason Tabrys

Give Dinklage a sellsword like Bronn in real life and let him go to work. – Matthew Jackson

Do any of you know of any news about Universal’s plans for “The Eye of the World”? – Peter

I wish I did, but sadly it seems to be at a stall for the moment, possibly because it’s an unbelievably complex thing to try to adapt. – Matthew Jackson

Do you guys put out? ;} – Monique

We are too sexy for sex. – Jason Tabrys

There is a dinner involved in this question isn’t there? I mean it seems implied that you would buy me dinner first. Not some fast food shack either, I’m talking steak and seafood, with a real tablecloth, and lots of silverware. – Mark Poynter

Yeah, I put out…milk for neighborhood cat all the time. What can I say, I love the pussy. -Luke Gallagher.

Two answers: 1. Yes. 2. If you use the line “you’re my only hope” then it’s a double yes. –Nick Bungay

I sometimes feel put out. Does that count? Bueller? – Adam A. Donaldson

Do you have Scotch? Is it single malt? – Matthew Jackson


Category: Comics, Featured, Film, Nerd Culture, TV, WTF?

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