This week’s Lost Girl recap comes in really, really late. The truth is that work’s been backed up since the weekend, but really, I’ll just pretend that “Turn to Stone” was a standard exercise in the old TV series trope where the writers take a breather from doing anything too daring as they walk back all their characters from the cliff they were left hanging on at the start of the season. No big deal, it’s part of what makes TV as warm and familiar as an old blanket, but that doesn’t mean you have to do something so dull. And if there’s one word you don’t want to associate with Lost Girl, it’s dull.

To begin with, let’s consider the shape of our triangle (haha!). At the top of the show, Bo seemed all too ready to get back on Team Dyson, not to mention get on back on Dyson himself. The werewolf, always being eager to please, made no complaints about it either. That’s fine, Bo being a succubus needs to feed, but when she feeds on Dyson she just doesn’t cross that fine line between being a succubus and being a cheater, she plows through it in a tank. But that’s okay, maybe it’s just over between Bo and Lauren, maybe they’re two ships that passed in the night and are now sailing in opposite directions. No one seemed to be stopping to ask the question.

There’s not much time though for romantic entanglements as Kenzi’s sprite cream peddler Massimo has had a couple of his goons rob the clubhouse as payment for Kenzi’s past due account. Bo’s not in a gaming mood though, and she threatens to beat Massimo down if he doesn’t return their stuff, doubly so when he reveals that conspired with Tamsin to shuffle Bo off this mortal plain. But it’s cool. Massimo says all’s forgiven if the “Ambiguously Fae Duo” collect a rare Japanese herb from the green wall in Lauren’s apartment.

Here’s where we cut into territory so melodramatic I thought I was watching The Vampire Diaries for a minute. I know, Lost Girl has its fair share of relationship chatter, but there’s usually more honesty to it, a feeling that it comes from some place real despite the supernatural and not feeling as if it comes from something completely fake like a 1980s sitcom. Kenzi cops to kissing Dyson while Bo was away, and Bo gets self-righteous despite a) that fact that Dyson wasn’t her boyfriend at the time, and b) everyone was under a spell that made them forget Bo had ever existed. If ever you should get a mulligan for killing your bestie’s ex-boyfriend it’s when you’re under a magic spell that forces you to forget said friend. I mean, I would think.

Next, Kenzi confessed that the reason she was pushing to be fae herself was because she was tired of feeling helpless, and always being reminded that she’s weak and vulnerable. Whoa, who said any of this? Okay, people have said it to Kenzi in the past, sure, but she always proved that she wasn’t any of those things in her typical Kenzi way. Wasn’t she the one that went back in to the Garuda’s lair alone to rescue Dyson in season two? Yes it was, and I’ve got to think that even amongst the fae, it’s better to be human then have the Jubilee powers of the sprites and be mocked mercilessly.

But while Kenzi was having identity issues of her own, Tamsin continued her strange trip through this latest reincarnation. Although the Tamsin of old was tough and cool and definitely not one to be trifled with, this Tamsin is still emotionally a pre-teen even if she looks like Rachel Skarsten. It turns out that Massimo was less interested in settling his debt with Kenzi than he was in separating Bo and Kenzi from Tamsin so he could kidnap her, and get a hold of her valuable valkyrie hair. Bo beat Massimo and stops him from making a bald valkyrie, while Bo promises Tamsin that she never hated her despite what Tamsin thought, and the two of them to hug and make up. If only it were that easy with all the women in Bo’s life.

Speaking of which, we did catch-up with Lauren in one of Jigsaw’s lairs after she was kidnapped at the end of last week’s episode. Crystal was chained up there too and… Ugh. You know what? I didn’t care. We learn that Lauren’s real name is Karen and that she and her brother were eco-terrorists who ended up accidentally killing 11 people by bombing some pipeline. It’s a timely and intriguing back story, wrapped up in another, silly Lauren-in-peril tale. After her captors force a demonstration of her diagnostic abilities, Lauren believes that her jailer is none other than Hale, who, to her mind, is still the ash, which makes it something of a surprise when the person who’s keeping her prison reveals themselves. Off camera, of course. I guess we’ll find out for ourselves next week.

The episode did have its intriguing elements though (after we had to slog through for much of the hour). A very paternal Dyson, after telling Tamsin a bedtime story, tells Kenzi that she doesn’t have to a fae to have a place in the fae world. An intrigued Kenzi is curious and wants to know the hows and whats, but all Dyson tells her that he can teach her, and he’ll do so when the time is right. As for Tamsin, she has wings now, which sounds awesome, but is actually a telltale sign at she’s on her last life. But then again, if Doctor Who can find away to give The Doctor more incarnations, maybe they can get some Time Lord magic to work for Tam-Tam when her time comes.

In a final bit of “Now this is getting interesting,” Bo pays a visit to the Una mens telling them that she doesn’t care what they say and that “I don’t live by your rules; I’ll never live by your rules.” The Una mens are not amused. They came to eliminate the unaligned succubus and she has been eliminated, her heart has chosen a side and she’s chosen dark. Boom. Bo is a dark fae now. But how can this be, and what does this mean? And did we really need that Weeping Angel knock-off the gargoyle? You make jokes all you want about the show being Canadian, but I expect better of Lost Girl than to do something cheap.

What did you guys think of “Turn to Stone?” Sound off with your comments below.

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