Catwoman – The Impossible Contortionist!

Okay, I get it, Catwoman is sexy. That’s basically been her defining characteristic since DC rebooted their entire line of comics last fall. Remember when she and Batman did the nasty in her first issue, and it was, y’know, kind of nasty? Oh! And how about when they first reintroduced Ms. Selina Kyle we didn’t see her face until several pages into the book, after prominent shots of her bewbz and ass? Now DC has really outdone themselves. Just look at the cover for Catwoman’s zero issue (above). Just look at it! What the fuck is going on?!? Sure comics are known for twisting their female characters into unbelievable contortions in order to show off their goods, but this?! How is this even sexy?

Not surprising, most people find this cover ridiculous. DC Women Kicking Ass has a wonderful essay on why this cover is so terrible, beyond the ridiculousness of the pose, that you should really check out. Notably she remarks on why is this how DC has chosen to portray Catwoman to new readers when they’re all about to meet Anne Hathaway‘s Catwoman in The Dark Knight Rises. (I’m not even delving into why DC is doing zero issues and renumbering their entire line, again, because one post can only contain so much idiocy.) How do the two even relate? Here’s Hathaway’s Catwoman,


Speak Up: Jim Carrey’s Love Letter to Emma Stone as Read by His Ass

The ever so creepy and way meth-facey, Jim Carrey (Dumb and Dumber) recorded a personalized video message to actress Emma Stone (The Help, The Amazing Spider-Man) and posted it to the Internet. Sounds harmless enough, but the Canadian actor ups the iggy factor. Not only does he confess his love for the red headed wonder, but he admits that if not for their 27 year age difference, he’d  bang the shit out of her.

I think this happens to some guys, where they don’t realize that they are now the creepy old dude and it is completely inappropriate to even look in the direction of a lady under 30. Jim, you’re that dude now.

Anyway, Jim later reported that the video was intended to be a joke (Yea right!) but the real joke came from the magic of the internet. Thanks to Jeremy Hyler and his youtube page  he ingeniously turns the video from creepy to internet gold. Blending the audio from Jim’s love confession with ass talk video from Ace Ventura Pet Detective, Jeremy created the perfect way to say “I love you”.


Via: Film Drunk