Steven King‘s The Stand was adapted to a miniseries back in the ’90’s, with Gary Sinise and Molly Ringwald playing the leads. All I remember is the wheelchair guy from Forrest Gump acting like bad-ass (Sinise) and that the telling and overall scope of the series barely encompassed Kings novel. Now Warner Bros. wants to re-make it into a 2+ hour movie. I don’t think a single regular length cinematic adaptation could do the book justice. However, I suppose the story and character depth can be cherry picked and make for an adequate adaption. I’d prefer they leave well enough alone, but it’s happening anyway.

So.. onto the latest news. According to Deadline, Warner Bros. has handed the task of directing and adapting the novel to…Ben Affleck. Uh, what? I didn’t see that coming. Not at all. As Deadline notes, the actor, who has been doing wearing the director hat as of late, including his current directorial project, Argo, has proven his directorial skills, along with Gone Baby Gone and The Town. Deadline doesn’t state whether this is a done deal for Affleck to direct, or if Warner Bros has merely offered him the gig.

I like Affleck’s work as a director, but I think The Stand is not yet in his wheelhouse. If he takes the job he’ll Boston-ize the shit out of it. On the other hand, Casey Affleck would be amazing as Stu Redman.

I feel another TV series would be better. Like on HBO or something and have Darabont or some shit do it up.

So.. Ben Affleck directing a famous, classic Stephen King film. Are you, the reader, psyched on this? Or, does Affleck lack the imagination and comprehension of  King’s finest (arguably) work? Also, Do you like apples?

The Stand tells the story of an outbreak that destroys a good portion of the world’s population, leaving the survivors to split into two groups, one good, and the other evil. That’s a very abridged synopsis of the story.It’s one of those Crash like deals, where story is told through different people, all of whom are connected by what’s going on.


Give me a P. Give me an A. Give me an X. What does that spell? PAX…you dyslexic sucka duck! YES, the much-anticipated, annual, nerdfest PAX East (a la Penny Arcade) in Boston came, went and totally took advantage of the prime real estate that is my body. I need a breath mint, deodorant and massage from a small Vietnamese woman with mighty – yet gentle- hands (and is up for expected happy ending). For those of you scratching your heads wondering what the hell is PAX East?! First, I’d like to slap you upside the head for being an ignorant douche-canoe. This is our culture. How do you not know about this?!?! OK, here’s a quick run-through: PAX East, is  like a smaller E3, but intended for consumers rather than developers. See, they get a bunch of video game hot shots to show off their hardware, software and um…in some cases hot chicks in tall boots

These boots were made for walkin' and that's just what they'll do, these boots are gonna walk all over you"

"These boots are made for walking, and that's just what they'll do, one of these days these boots are gonna walk all over you."

Then, they invite the public to hang out and fall in love with all kinds of the latest, greatest gear and games on (or about to enter) the video game scene. Attendees can play games, attend panel sessions about all kinds of cool stuff, see live music and even compete in video game tournaments! Exciting, right? YES! Especially if you like shiny bags of SWAG, the occasional hot chick in costume, new technology, and inspiring speeches.

So now you have a pretty solid idea of what goes on in general. What might not be entirely clear to you is the feeling of “home”. *cue the violin for sappy time* Let’s face it, we as gamers are strange and weird. We typically don’t mesh well with the world outside our own. The acceptance in ordinary society is growing quite rapidly, but how many people in your life truly appreciate and understand your pleasure, your obsession, your escape? While we’re predominantly having too much fun to care, wouldn’t it be nice to be embraced by a collective mutuality? After all, you know gamer friends are the perfect circle of people you always want to hang out with. Why not a sea of thousands, all singing to the tune of “Let’s Play”? Simply put, PAX is your haven. Your heaven. Your home.

Now, onto swamp ass, girls and games.