Graphic by Jeremy R! Hudson

There is no grey area, no subtlety — William Shatner is, and today the man who will forever be known as Captain James T. Kirk, turns 81 years old.

In my life I’ve been both thrilled and horrified by the Shat. A man who co-exists in my memory as this energy infused swagger machine with a baby-making smile in re-runs of Star Trek: TOS and also as the Priceline guy, whose self respect hurdled to it’s demise long before the “character” did. Should I have spoiler alerted that? Oh well.

Shatner has played a lawyer, a cop, a dad who says shit, and a man cursed with the ability to only speak inĀ Esperanto, and through it all he did barely any of it convincingly. Still, he did it because he so clearly loved the sound of applause and the benefits that come from it. Shatner has long been a joke, a ham, but he is our ham, loveable in how eagerly he wants to please, and so on his special day, we say thank you and well done to William Shatner with these 5 signature moments from his 5 decade long career.


I learned everything I have ever needed to know from watching Star Trek. I thought that was enough….it was not. Here’s William Fuckin’ Shatner emphasizing the dangers of turkey fryers. Because it takes a turkey to know a turkey.

Shatner is 80 years old and still loves the pay checks. Also… he’s a vegetarian and Canadian, they celebrated ThanksgivingĀ  months ago. Regardless, this was very entertaining and educational. Bill Shatner and the dingle-dangle… they’ve probably prevented at least a few cases of horrible burn victims.