Mario If He Existed in Unreal 4


Nintendo’s NX is the next big thing on their table and is billed to be a brand-new concept that will “transform gamer’s lives” when it launches. Sounds a little similar to what was being said when the Nintendo Revolution had yet to become the Wii, so I’m more than a little skeptical about their intentions. Still, it’s going to be their next dedicated gaming platform and, if they’ve learned anything in the last couple hardware cycles, will be a powerful machine capable of running the most modern engines. To demonstrate what that could mean for Nintendo’s most famous property, one crafty YouTuber put together this absolutely stunning video.  (more…)

Opinion: The End of Nintendo


With reports that Sony will debut the PS4 in three weeks and with a possible holiday release on the table, the next generation has begun. Soon, Microsoft will follow with their Xbox 360 follow-up and Nintendo will sit there, their latest system not even a year old, their gamble foolish from the start.

A few years ago, when the Wii pioneered motion gaming — making it a must have system for casual gamers, families, and a lot of people who had never before owned a console before — it seemed like they could do no wrong.

Back then, the mobile gaming market wasn’t dominated by smartphones and tablets. Back then, Sony and Microsoft got caught on their heels, fighting a war over half the available market.

Then, back then ended. Android and Apple seized the mobile market and Sony and Microsoft eventually lowered their prices, marketed their systems as home entertainment hubs that could do things that the Wii could not, and then they entered the motion gaming market as well, with the Move and the Kinect, robbing Nintendo of the one thing that made them unique.

What makes them unique now? Their lack of foresight, and their pending irrelevancy.

See, when Sony and Microsoft had Nintendo beat, the House of Mario doubled down and brought a new system to market, even as it’s peers were writing off this generation and preparing to move into the future.

Will that system, the Wii U, be able to stand in against competition that will surely have them beat in every facet of the game? All signs point to no.


The End. 

Companies die. It’s a sad thing because it means jobs and legacies vanish, but Atari just filed for bankruptcy, and Sega abandoned the console game years ago, fully aware that smaller companies cannot compete in the console wars against companies like Sony and now Microsoft — a lesson that Nintendo is now learning more fully.

Why am I so confident that the end is near for Nintendo, the home of NES and Gameboy, one of the industries’ forefathers?

I’m confident because they’re already beginning to erode, even before the next Sony and Microsoft system hit the market. From a report on Forbes.com:

Nintendo cut sales forecasts for all of its hardware and software today, most notably the Wii U. The company slashed shipping estimates on the Wii U from 5.5 million to 4, and software estimates from 24 million to 16.

The article goes on to say that, despite a profitable holiday season quarter, that Nintendo still suffered an annual loss last year. Again, this is in the last days of disco for an ending generation, and Nintendo couldn’t even live up to their own expectations with it’s new, shiny product (with current gen performance capabilities) that they are now locked into.

What about the DS and the 3DS? According to TGDaily:

The company also cut forecasts for its other consoles. 3DS sales are now likely to be 15 million by March – 14 percent fewer than predicted – with DS sales down eight percent on their forecast at 2.3 million.

Now, I don’t want to sound like I’m eager to dance on Nintendo’s grave. I grew up with an NES in my living room and adored the N64, but the past is the past and Nintendo’s corporate overlords have demonstrated a lack of vision and painful ineptitude when it comes to reading their own marketplace.

Who is the Wii U for anyway? As I said, motion gaming is now available on every system, so they have no edge there. What about hardcore gamers? Turns out they require top-line graphics and strong third party developer support — things that the Wii U doesn’t provide. Home entertainment fans? The Wii U doesn’t have a Blu Ray player. Budget conscious shoppers? You can buy a 500 gig PS3, with the Blu Ray player for the same price as a base model Wii U with only 8 gigs, and that doesn’t even count the cost of an extra tablet controller.

Is Nintendo pondering a price cut to try and gain a foothold? No, their doubling down on their failures once again.

Like I said, I don’t want Nintendo to fail, but they’re handheld products are equaled by other multi-functional products that are viewed as essential by most consumers, something that renders their products in-essential. Furthermore, they released an overpriced, under-performing, awkward to use console that doesn’t meet the demands of the average consumer, a consumer whose expectations are set to rise when Sony and Microsoft announce their new products, products that I imagine will one day host Mario and other Nintendo properties as the company stumbles down the same ravine that Sega did.

It didn’t have to be like this. The future was plowing toward the station and instead of waiting, Nintendo jumped too early and fell right onto the tracks.

They could have strived for innovation, they could have aimed for a niche, any niche, but instead, they relied on the strength of brand loyalty and the assumption that Wii owners would rejoice over backwards compatible peripherals, and everyone else would wait for the system to offer a healthy library of games.

Sadly though, the market doesn’t wait, and now Nintendo’s window has closed and they are a cautionary tale.

Game Over.

Hot on the heels of the recently released Wii U, Nintendo’s next generation console gaming platform, comes news that the next iteration of X-Box is on its way in the next year, according to Bloomberg News.

Sources inside, or close to, Microsoft are saying that the company is looking to a potential release date of next Thanksgiving (American, not Canadian) in order to take maximum advantage of the holiday sales period. The company is also debating right now the best way to unveil the new system, the choice being a big reveal at an industry event like E3 or a dedicated event organized by Microsoft. An official statement from Microsoft was not made when asked about the rumor.

Wii U was released a few weeks ago and sold more than 400,000 units in its first seven days of release, while the original Wii sold another 300,000 over the busy Thanksgiving week sales period. But X-Box 360 remains the industry leader, selling 750,000 units over the same period allowing Microsoft to remain the best-seller for 22 straight months.

Still no world yet on a release date for the next generation of Playstation. {tumbleweed}

More news will appear here as it develops.

Source: Business Insider

The results of Wii U’s first week of sales are good. Not Wii good, but good just the same (according to Gizmodo).

The sales numbers are officially in, and it seems that in it’s first week after the launch, the Wii U, Nintendo’s next generation console, sold 400,000 units, which is about 200,000 fewer Wiis that sold when that system was released six years ago, but still decent numbers.

Helping along those numbers were Black Friday sales, which ratcheted up Nintendo’s total haul for the week up to 1.2 million units, including Wii Us, various handheld units and and over 300,000 original Wii systems. It proves that despite the updated system, there’s still money to be made in the original Wii, and it proves that despite some mixed reviews, the new Wii seems to be very enticing to the video game playing public. That’s a good move on the part of Nintendo, being the first one out of the gate with the next generation of gaming system ahead of both Microsoft and Sony.

In other Wii news, Nintendo is releasing the new smaller Wii Mini for $99 on December 7th. The trick is that you have to be living in or near Canada can take advantage of it because the Mini system will only be available in the Great White North. (Eat it, Americans!)

So why no Wii Mini love for the United States? The Nintendo website offers no explanation, but Dan Milano of ABC News says that “Perhaps a quiet, limited relaunch is a good thing. Saving less knowledgeable parents and relatives from picking up the wrong ‘new Wii’ and causing Christmas morning disappointment.”

The Wii Mini will have no internet capabilities and will not be able to play GameCube games, but otherwise it will have all the fun of the regular Wii system for the low price point.

What say you Bastards, have you had a chance to play the new Wii yet, or are you sticking to the original?

Today was Nintendo‘s big announcement of the Wii U‘s release date – November 18th – plus more specifics on their next generation console. Kotaku has kindly provided a great summary of what we know and what we still don’t know about the Wii U. Here’s the highlights.

First off, the price. There are two different prices for two different bundles. There’s the basic bundle which sounds like the option if you already own a Wii and are only interested in upgrading your hardware, not the bells and whistles Nintendo’s lumping in with their deluxe bundle. In the basic bundle, for $299, you’ll get,

…the console (which is way more powerful than the Wii and somewhere in the ballpark of the PS3/Xbox360, give or take… probably better, not worse), the GamePad (the signature of the system, a controller with a 6.2-inch screen, two analog thumbsticks, a forward-facing camera, a bunch of face buttons and a gyro sensor), 8GB of on-board memory, AC adapters for the console and controller, a sensor bar and—surprise!—an HDMI cable. It’s white. It does not come with any Wii Remotes, which will be used in many multiplayer games. Hopefully you have some. They need to be Wii Remote Pluses.

And while this bundle seems to contain everything you’ll need to get the Wii U experience, since I’m sure what most of you are interested in is that GamePad, there are some significant bonuses to the deluxe bundle. For the price of $349.99 you’ll get,

…all of the above, though with 32GB of on-board memory, a console stand, a charging cradle for the GamePad and a membership in something called the Deluxe Digital Promotion (DDP!), which will provide discounts for digital downloads, through 2014. The Deluxe version comes with Wii U flagship game Nintendo Land packed in.

The extra memory is easily the biggest perk, but the addition of the console stand, a charging cradle for the GamePad, and a DDP membership sounds nifty. And for an extra $50 that’s not bad, especially if you’re serious about being an early adopter of the Wii U. I believe if they wanted to make that deluxe package truly deluxe they’d have included New Super Mario Bros. U over Nintendoland, but they seem adamant we be excited about some silly theme park game.

The other interesting addition is TVii. I know, I know, the whole adding “ii” to something is exceptionally dumb, but the service does sound kind of neat. It’s, obviously, a streaming service which will give you access to things like Netflix, Hulu, and YouTube on the GamePad, “even if someone else in the house is using the TV that the Wii U is hooked up to. It’ll even pull stuff that was DVR’d on your TiVo.” That is something I remember them really hammering home at E3, the ability to use the Wii U even if the TV is being used by someone else. That’s a cool feature and it’ll be interesting to see what Microsoft and Sony come up with to compete. I guess there’s Microsoft’s SmartGlass, but I don’t get the impression that’s nearly as robust an experience as what the GamePad will provide.

Game wise we can expect Nintendo Land and New Super Mario Bros. U to be the available launch day games with Call of Duty: Black Ops II, Bayonetta 2 – a surprising Wii U exclusive – ZombiU, Pikmin 3, Wonderful 101, Assassin’s Creed III, Mass Effect 3, Lego City Undercover, Wii Fit U and many more throughout the launch window of November 18 through March 31.

Knowing all this, are you excited about the Wii U? Will you buy one the day it releases and if so which bundle? Do you think Wii U will be collecting dust once the novelty wears off like its sad older brother the Wii? Personally, I still use my Wii to watch Netflix and the like but it’s been ages since I played a game on the system. I’m unsure if the Wii U provides a different enough gaming experience that I’ll feel compelled to shell out $300 bucks. You?

Every day the internet produces an astounding amount of goodies and gems. Most hilarious, some amusing, but all worth at least a few seconds of your time. We here at Nerd Bastards try to bring you the best bits of news and nerdery the webz has to offer, with a bit of snark thrown in. But sometimes not everything makes the cut. Monday through Friday we’ll be bringing you our inbox leftovers, our forgotten bookmarks, the nerdy bits that simply slipped through the cracks. You can submit items to Nerdy Bits by emailing us at nerdybits@nerdbastards.com.

Above: Here’s a personal submission to Nerdy Bits. This beauty was found at a weekend summer festival I attended. It’s an NES pipe! And honestly, what better way is there to repurpose such a classic controller. Remember you can send in your own submissiong for Nerdy Bits at the email above!


I don’t consider myself a super hard-core gamer, but I have, for a time, discounted the ability of Nintendo to service my gaming needs. In all honesty, the N64 was the last Nintendo system that I had any love or respect for as a gaming system (the Wii is to be respected for its ground breaking motion controller though), so while the technical advances that were promised with the Wii U pad were intriguing, I’d be lying if I said that anything shy of a miracle could have convinced me to invest money into a Wii U. As you can tell from the title of this article, that miracle didn’t come, and instead I found Nintendo’s presentation lacking in announcements that would convert even the most open-minded gamer.

For one thing, the games were an epic failure. More kid friendly originals (like you’d expect) that don’t speak to a lot of adult gamers (unless I can figure out how to kill shit in Scribblenauts) and ones that actually would, like Super Mario Bros. U, Zelda, or Smash Brothers, that were either extremely disappointing (Mario, which looked like a game that should live as DLC, not a stand alone disc) or non-existent at the presentation.

There were games that peaked my interest, like Zombi U, but unlike Sony’s The Last of Us, the game didn’t seem to have an interest in shaking up a familiar concept, and instead it seemed like a standard FPS zombie game that was only unique because of the Wii U pad. Now, admittedly, holding up the pad to use a sniper scope in the game was pretty cool, but this “new way of gaming” doesn’t feel very intuitive, and it actually seems like it would be awkward, distracting, and time consuming. All things that every gamer loves in the midst of a fast paced zombie game.

Third party games like Arkham City: Armored Edition, Mass Effect 3, and Darksiders 2, seem like simple ports or ports with a few extra bells and whistles. That’s something that Reggie Fils-Aime seemed to take issue with after the presentation when Spike’s Geoff Keighley made that observation to him, but those denials, assurances, and requests to, essentially, get people to overlook what they saw with their own eyes aren’t likely going to work.

Honestly, and Keighley alluded to this with Fils-Aime in the chair — these are tough times, and people can’t afford to drop $60 on the same game that they’ve already beat, and they can’t afford to buy a system that offers nearly no advantages over it’s (most likely) lower priced competitors either.

Luigi's Ghost Mansion... or Pac Man...

That price is another thing, we still have no answer from Nintendo on how much this thing will cost, and what specs will be inside of it — information that might help position the system as competition for the big boys.

Really, what we know from the Wii U is that they have 3rd party support on some new games, paltry exclusives, and nothing that promise to knock anybody out. If that wasn’t bad enough, they also have a piece of hardware which may be, at once, an inch above and a mile below it’s competition.

Sure, the Wii U pad will have Hulu, Youtube, and Netflix, but as someone on the @NerdBastards twitter pointed out during our tweet and watch, we all have numerous devices that do that. Right now, I’ve got 3 of them within 10 feet of me, including a year old cell phone.

An idea like the Mverse is a neat enough idea, the secondary screen could be cool, and Nintendo Land is a nice enough concept whose novelty wore off before the show was even over, but really, this is a system you buy if you are a Nintendo loyalist, or someone looking to come off of a Wii who hasn’t yet discovered the superiority of an Xbox 360 and the PS3.

The problem with Wii is the same problem Wii U looks like it will face, and it is an interesting parallel with the other two companies that presented at E3 — Sony wants to be a game system, Microsoft wants to be a media hub, and Nintendo doesn’t know how to do either, so it tries to be both and it fails miserably.

At the start of this presentation Reggie Fils-Aime proclaimed that the Wii U would change our lives, but in the end, I don’t think the Wii U presentation changed a thing — try as they might to re-court gamers, Nintendo lost this war a long, long time ago.

To take a look at our thoughts on Sony’s E3 presentation, click here. For Microsoft’s, click here.




Here we have two young (and legal) ladies, Bex & Amy. They are “professional” dancers. In the (SAFE FOR WORK) video below,  they perform a Super Mario Bros.-themed pole-dancing routine for some kind of pole-dancing competition.

The best part was the music. I’m not seeing much here than cheap nerd gimmicks they did to earn some kudos. Regardless, it is funny and mildy sexy, moustahces and all.

Your perception of Mario and Luigi will never be the same again.

Via: Topless Robot

If you were a fans of the Nintendo 64 back in the day then you were definitely a fan of the original Goldeneye video game. For many of us that was our first “four-way” outside of the Playstation, spending hours with three of your friends shooting with every manner of 007 gadget and gun you could acquire. Brings back some painful memories too, remember your first tea-bagging fellas, pretty humiliating.

Well load up the P90 and shine that Golden gun because Britain’s smooth talking secret agent is back in Goldeneye: Reloaded 007, coming out on Playstation 3, Xbox 360 and Wii U. This re-imaging of the classic game from RARE has more nostalgia then you could shake a stick at and it looks like fun. Rocking an opening speech from resident villain, Alec Trevelyan it really sets a fresh tone for the same game we played oh so many years ago.

I’m getting slappers just thinking about it.

source: The Daily What


Nintendo Announces the Wii 2!

By now your Wii is probably sitting alone in a corner, collecting dust, weeping. That’s right, feel guilty about you neglected console.  But let’s face it, if you live in a multi-console home there are simply less and less reasons to turn on your Wii when the Xbox 360 and PS3 outmatch it at every turn. Especially since the introduction of motion control for these other systems the allure of the Wii has faded.

Nintendo is thinking ahead though, and again they will be the forerunners of a new generation of gaming consoles. Announced today, the Wii is getting a sequel. The as-of-yet unnamed console could be releasing as early as April 2012 and could also be sporting some seriously beefy specs. Kotaku originally leaked some supposed specifications for a new Nintendo project, “Project Cafe” which is thought by many to be the infamous Wii 2. Here’s what they uncovered,

• GPU – Wii 2’s GPU will be a modified version of AMD’s R700 architecture.
• CPU – The CPU will be a custom-designed triple-core version of the IBM PowerPC chipset.
• Visuals – Project Cafe will run in 1080p, and may be able to utilize Stereoscopic 3D, though it hasn’t been confirmed as a feature.
• Size & Design – The console will be around the same size as the first-gen Xbox 360, and may be designed to look like a futuristic looking Super Nintendo.
• Price – Say goodbye to Nintendo having the “budget” console: Project Cafe may cost between 350 and 400 dollars.
• Release Date – Supposedly, the Cafe itself could be ready to ship from the manufacturer to retailers as soon as mid-to-late October, but in order to give developers more time with the new hardware, Nintendo may not launch the console until early 2012.

They are also reporting the system’s controller might be, “a novel controller interface which marries a traditional d-pad-and-buttons scheme with a large touch-screen input.” IGN posted a supposed mock-up,

Of course, all of this is rumor and speculation, like about 95% of the internet. Nintendo is expected to unveil this new console at E3 this June.

A new Wii? With boosted specs will it be enough to finally surpass that incredible machine, PS3? I’d hope so. Nintendo is the grand-daddy of home gaming systems. It would be nice to see it step up with current convenience, like HD video and a more powerful CPU. I need to see Mario is glorious 1080p! And a controller which includes a touchscreen interface? I’m extremely intrigued. While this new Wii will supposedly also work current Wiimotes a touchscreen controller is a step in a very different direction. The Wii was all about motion so I was expecting something similar to the Kinect. But maybe Nintendo’s realized motion controlling is a bit of fad and aren’t relying on it for their next system.

Who knows!? But please begin speculating with us, we’ve only got two months to start guessing and then be proven wrong and be possibly disappointed by  E3! Only two months!

source: Kotaku